Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Teach your children well

One of my favorite blogs to read daily is Here's The Diehl and she has encouraged her fellow bloggers to put down their shiny happy persona's for one day and reveal their flaws. Oh Lord, we could be here all day! ha! ha! I have had to come to terms with my flaws and it seems like with every stage of life there is always a moment when you figure out that you're not perfect in some way.

A friend of mine and I recently had a chance to talk to one another about things that we've been going through with our children and some of the revelations that we've had in our own lives. And I said that I don't want to protect my children from disappointment and failure, I just want to make sure that I give them the tools to handle those things in the best way possible. And I think that as a parent, you can't expect that you are going to shield your child from the rough times, but you should strive to teach them how to maneuver through them.

Our kids know we're not perfect, on occasion they have seen Randy and I have a "discussion", they have seen me break down and cry, they have witnessed us each fall in our lives, but they have also seen us work through any marital issues, they have seen us dust ourselves off and get back up, so they know that even when times get tough, that there is a way out of it.

Now, I certainly don't expose our kids to more than they can handle at their ages. I definitely wouldn't want my children to have to deal with more than they have the capacity to deal with -they have stresses at that age that they are dealing with.....they certainly don't need an overdose of adult stress. I think in life it's important to give them opportunities to be independent, to learn how to deal with life, etc., but I know of some parents that offer these opportunities too fast and that forces their kids to grow up really soon and they miss out on the childhood stuff.

So every day I strive to be real, I am going to have break downs, I am going to have challenges, and not only am I learning and growing with everything that comes my way, my children are learning how to manage as well. I know it's a little corny, but I can't help of "Teach Your Children Well" by Crosby, Stills, & Nash......

You who are on the road
Must have a code that you can live by
And so become yourself
Because the past is just a good bye.

Teach your children well,
Their father's hell did slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picked, the one you'll know by.

Don't you ever ask them why,
if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.

And you, of tender years,
Can't know the fears that your elders grew by,
And so please help them with your youth,
They seek the truth before they can die.

Can you hear and do you care and
Cant you see we must be free to
Teach your children what you believe in.
Make a world that we can live in.

Teach your parents well,
Their children's hell will slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picked, the one you'll know by.

Don't you ever ask them why,
if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.

1 comment:

heresthediehl said...

Hey, thanks for the mention!

I love that your kids have seen you work through problems as a couple; I think that's so important and healthy (obviously within reason, as you said) for them as they form their views on marriage!