And that's all I have to say about that

I've said it once and I'll say it again......

2011-02-15T09:45:00.001-06:00

I wanna move to Arizona!

While teetering on the black ice wearing stiletto boots walking in to Wal-Mart to buy the 50% off Valentine's candy for my office I grumbled about the cold, damp, icy conditions of Illinois.

That's all.

Technology Is Creating So Many Issues

2011-02-14T11:04:00.001-06:00

This weekend I was behind a van at a stoplight and I could clearly see the movie "Nemo" and I wondered.......what if I rear-ended the van because the movie was at one of my favorite parts and I wasn't paying attention? What would I tell the officer? Wouldn't it be the fault of the car in front of me for playing one of my favorite movies? Does my insurance cover that? Do they now have to write tickets for "following too closely due to moving viewing"? Technology has created so many issues.

Another issue, well not really an issue, but a loss of a freedom - is the fact that we have almost completely lost the ability to prank call someone. I mean....cell phones give the number right there, most home phones now have caller ID, and the internet has the reverse telephone number look-up abilities to give your "victim" all of your contact information and totally gives you up right then and there. I mean.....when I was a kid it was so fun to call random people and tell them that they won a radio contest, or give them a false name and have a funny conversation with them.....all good clean fun really and totally harmless. My kids will never have the ability to do that due to technology and if one night I have too much wine and feel a little silly, I will be unable to do that too.

And another thing.....social networking sites like Facebook have the ability to ruin playing hooky. I mean if you are a student or work and you "call in sick" and then you have friends post pictures of you laying out, having lunch, shopping, OR you update your location from your phone not thinking that someone at work or school will rat you out. Playing hooky occasionally is completely harmless and sometimes is necessary for mental health purposes. If you are going to do this - DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT get online or on your phone for that entire day. When you play hooky from work, school, etc., play hooky from technology that day too.

That's all.....just a few random observations from me.

I'm having one of those days...weeks....months....lives!

2011-02-12T10:19:00.000-06:00

I am not feeling like myself lately - I am pale when I want to be tan, I cut all my hair off and I hate it, I colored my hair dark which makes me feel even more pale, I hate my weight and am not close to where I want to be, and I am having one of those blah weeks where I feel like a big blob of blobbiness....if that's not a word, it is now.

Why is it when I am super blessed with so many things that I feel this way? As a wife and mother I find myself sacrificing so many things for the happiness of my husband and children. I mean, I can't remember the last time that someone made me breakfast or that I even had a pizza with the toppings I like! In addition to that I work full-time and am helping others all day long - I walked into the office the other day only to hear "Angela, when you get a chance I need your help", "Angela, when you have a chance I need to see you", "Angela, I need you to update this document for my meeting in 5 minutes"......I hadn't even taken my coat off! That is my life and I think after awhile I get lost in all of it and lose my true sense of self. When I finally take the time to look I am not happy with who I am.

As wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, friends, etc. we cannot forget to take care of ourselves. I know what I need to do to make myself feel better - continue working out with my friend in the morning, eat well, my hair will grow, a little sunshine (and tan towels) will help give me a little color, and when we order pizza I am going to fight for the canadian bacon, green pepper, and mushroom toppings that I like......I don't like sausage and onion. And when I walk into work I will take my coat off, sit at my desk and get ready for my day, and everyone else's "emergencies" will have to wait a second because in order to be the best person I can be I need to take a moment to myself.

I am obviously terrible at keeping up with my blog!

2011-02-10T15:21:00.001-06:00

I have nothing else to say, but that I have failed at blogging.....I get a big fat F in blogging......I cannot claim to have a blog as I don't tend to it like I should.......I should be ashamed of myself! Eh, I'm not gonna beat myself up over this, obviously I am super busy with family, work, life, that I just never have time to blog! But that doesn't mean that I don't enjoy it. I enjoy putting my thoughts out there for complete strangers to ~~judge analyze~~ ~~ridicule~~ read.....I've said it before and I'll say it again, it's cheap therapy!

I'm here today with no promises tomorrow....but I will leave you with the last 7 months of blog topics I've thought of posting:

Things that June Cleaver wanted to say but never did.
Please stop touching that.
Please stop picking that.
Please stop itching there in public.
STREAKS STREAKS STREAKS - one females journey in doing laundry for the three males in her home.
I'm going to lose it right here in the middle of a superstore.
The Battle of the Bulge - blood, sweat, and tears - the war continues.

Jock Straps and Tackle Boxes

2010-07-20T17:00:00.000-05:00

I have to laugh being the only girl in a male-dominated household - there are many first for me on a daily basis and there are a lot of things that just make me scratch my head.

Here is an actual conversation between my husband and I yesterday -

DH: Oops, I forgot to stop by the store and pick up a jock strap for Logan.
Me: Do you want me to do that on my way home from work?
DH: Can you please?
(long pause)
Me: What do I look for? I've never had to buy one of these before!

First time buying one of those, certainly not the last! And the even more funny story comes from our 9 year old son trying one on the first time! Let me just say we were all giggling and it was a hilarious family moment!

On the same day as this whole jock strap experience, me, the mother to boys that I don't completely understand why they do the things they do, or smell the way they smell (ha!) was cleaning the bathroom when I found a small tackle box in the magazine rack next to the toilet. Really? A tackle box? I guess that's just good time management on my sons part, but just another thing that baffles my female mind.

Boys are so fun and I enjoy being the princess of the house.......sometimes!

Life Lesson #5 - Money does not grow on trees

2010-07-19T11:33:00.001-05:00

I have heard myself say this numerous times throughout the summer - my kids are bombarded with television ads for new toys, their friends get something new and they just have to have it or they will die, or they look through the Sunday ads and the bright colored Toys R Us ad screams "YOU NEED ALL OF THESE TOYS". Aaaaahhhh!!!!!

My children see me clipping coupons, watching our pennies, and being as frugal as possible because we do have some debt, we are paying for full-time childcare through the summer and we are living in this poor economy right now doing the very best we can. So when they ask for "stuff" it just drives me nutty......I have tried and tried and tried to teach them about giving and appreciating what they have and waiting until holidays and birthdays for gifts, etc. - but the lesson just isn't sticking.

We talk about chores and allowance so that they can earn their own money, but that really hasn't taken very well - it probably has something to do with parental consistency - of which, Randy and I falter on a little! My type A personality probably has a little to do with that.....the mind set of "Oh, just let me do that" gets in the way sometimes! I need to have a talk with myself about that! ha!

I have been very proud of Logan for putting much of his birthday money, well, in fact all of his birthday money into savings. He says he is saving up for an X-Box......mmmmmkkkkkkaaaaayyyyyy......the Nintendo DS, Playstation 2, and Wii apparently aren't enough to satisfy him. I remember my parents buying an Atari set for me from a garage sale when Atari was soooooo over and then I remember having Nintendo 64 video game system when I was in the 5th grade and I think I had all of 4 games TOTAL. There is seriously something wrong with this picture......but what can I do about it???

I feel a little overloaded with technology sometimes.....something I've discussed before. I mean you can call anyone at any time, text them, download music anywhere, reach your Facebook friends whenever/wherever, GPS a location with the touch of a button, Skype someone who lives in Guam, Twitter where you are eating lunch, and there is soooooo much more - the iPads, iPhones, etc., etc., etc. On Sunday I told the children to turn the television off, turn off all video games, and we sat at our kitchen table snapping green beans. I loved it, it made me remember doing that very same thing with my grandmother at her kitchen table.....the kids hated it and Noah acted as if I had sentenced him to jail.

As much as I want to simplify, I just don't see it happening.......how to I turn my technology reliant family into a self-reliant, technology occasionally family? And I have to chuckle that I'm blogging this.....from my computer, with my cell-phone sitting next to me notifying me that I've just received a text......ha! ha!

New beginnings

2010-07-16T11:45:00.001-05:00

I should really blog more because I feel like I have a lot of things going on that others can relate to and if I can help one parent feel as though they are not alone in the struggles of having a child with anxiety, ADHD, ODD, etc., then I think it's worth it to take a few minutes to just type out my story.

My last post was in March and a lot has gone on since then - both of the boys ended their school years successfully, the boys played on the same baseball team for the first time ever (and probably the last), we have gone on a family vacation, there have been lots of celebrations, and tons of summer fun! There have also been moments of sheer frustration, tears, temper tantrums, calls to apologize to people that Logan wasn't kind to, and times when I have talk myself off of the "parenting ledge". Logan's diagnoses and treatments have certainly helped ease the frustrations of parenting a child with Logan's "quirks", however it doesn't mean that there aren't those moments that I haven't prepared myself for when Logan has a meltdown.

We are getting ready to go into a new school year and I feel like we are armed this year with everything we need to have a successful year. We met with Logan's teacher at the end of the school year and talked to her a bit so that she and Logan are both prepared for what is in store. I think back to last summer and it was about this time when some unusual behaviors began to surface in Logan and knowing what I know now, I know it was from anxiety. This year we are armed with a few counseling appointments before school begins and I know that will help him walk into school on that first day with less anxiety than he would normally have.

The baseball season was a rough one - whew! Having both boys on the same team worked out great schedule-wise, however the boys struggle to really get along because of Logan's anxious/worry-wart/slightly Type-A nature and Noah's free-spirit/go with the flow/laid back nature. And we had a real contrast in ball-players this year - a few with lots of experience and a lot with little experience. The boys had fun.....but there were moments when Logan who is ultra-competitive lost it and I found myself using all of the things I learned in counseling to calm him down.

What I find a lot of the time is that when he is getting upset he can calm himself down, however, when a coach or a parent or even a teammate says something harsh - he loses it. I see it happening and it's like the moment before I can stop it from happening a word/a phrase/a negative comment is made and "BAM" - he's spiraling downward. The thing I noticed this year is that when those break-downs happened I was more prepared and so calm about it, where as in the past I was embarrassed, frustrated, angry, etc. Counseling has really been good for all of us.....it helps Logan calm himself down and it helps us to be the best parents we can be for Logan and Noah.

There is a stigma of parenting a child with a personality like Logan's - I'm learning to have tougher skin, but when he has a melt-down and says something to a coach or a teammate that isn't kind and others look at you like it's your fault, that is tough to take. But I'm finding out that no parent/child/marriage/friendship/etc., is perfect and you should never judge others when you yourself are not perfect. This year has definitely been one where I've learned so much about relationships and about why other people do things they do. And I've learned a lot about living your life out loud and not living your life for others.

I find that Logan and I have a wonderfully functional relationship amongst all of the dysfunction. I understand him more now than ever, and I look back at the years of frustration, tears, pain and wish I had known how to calm both he and I down in those moments of sheer anxiety. But I know now and we're moving forward. Please note that not every day is perfection - one minute he's telling me that I'm such a wonderful mommy and the next minute he "hates" me.....we're a work in progress!! ha!

This new school year brings new beginnings for our children and I'm looking forward to them. Logan is going to play football and was told that he will wear his dad's number (#33) this season and he is really proud of that. My brother will be one of his coaches and I know that he's going to look out for Logan's best interests and all of the coaches in the football program are really positive and the kids learn a lot about life/teamwork/being the best you as well as football. I can't wait to see what this year brings for our little family.

We were on a break

2010-03-02T09:42:00.002-06:00

I have taken a break on blogging, partially because my crazy life hasn't allowed for much down time. Kids, work, remodeling our home, marriage, helping others, finding out I'm allergic to chocolate.....I'M ALLERGIC TO WHAT?!! Anyway, life has taken me away from writing down the goings on in our little life and here is a recap of our events in the past month.

Logan is doing well, he was asked to participate in two days of intense psychological evaluations that will give us insight into how to counsel, parent, and educate him. Those results should be in soon......I can't wait; but I'm a little scared to see it all on paper.
There have been really good days and some really bad days. Let's just say I've cried more in this past month as a mother than I ever have. Parenting a child with challenges takes a lot out of you and there are moments when you want to scream "why can't my life be normal", but then I look at my life in that very next moment and feel incredibly blessed!
Randy and I are re-carpeting our bedrooms, closets, and hallway in our house and so once again, our house is a disaster - BUT, it looks really good and I told him the other day that our house is not new, but I love it and I love the location and we take one major project a year to complete and have updated it so much - so we're making it our own.
Last Wednesday I found out that I'm allergic to quite a few things - soy, tree nuts, cocoa nut (which includes chocolate and cola), and something in the carrot family. So I am scurrying trying to figure out what I can/can't eat. AND I'm seriously thinking about starting a food blog to help others with these weird allergies. When I find the time of course!

So there, in a nutshell are some of the things that have been preventing me from sharing with you my life stories. Hope life has been treating you well!

Today has been a good day....baby steps

2010-01-26T10:41:00.002-06:00

My husband and I quietly picked up our children from their after-school program yesterday - fingers crossed that it had been a good day. They both survived the day - minor infractions for misbehavior, but they both survived - so far so good. As we drove home a little 8 year old hand was on my shoulder with a very quiet voice saying "I'm sorry for my behavior this morning mommy, I hope you didn't cry all day".....well, I hadn't cried all day, but I was definitely crying then.

Homework was done without incident, dinner was typical - family banter, discussions of how everyone felt their day went, and afterwards my husband and my oldest son played Connect Four and my youngest and I played Super Mario on his DS (my secret addiction). The evening was quiet and the issue came at bedtime, like it always does.....one child can't sleep for one reason or another and they end up in our bed.

This morning our oldest son did everything without incident, the youngest was a bit of a pill - not wanting to wake up - no biggie, and the only time I raised my voice was when the boys argued for the millionth time about who was getting out of the car first. As I type this I just came up with my solution.....one can sit in the passenger seat and they can both get out first. Now, however, the argument will be who is going to sit in the passenger seat! Oy vey!

So far today has been a good day and we take our baby steps into the rest of the day with hopes and prayers of continued peace for our family. I feel completely wiped out by the stresses, but I hold hope that the future will bring us answers, tools for success in raising our children to the best of our abilities, and ideas on how to handle mornings like yesterday morning. I am actively searching for a support group of some sort for my husband and I....the few that I have found in this area don't quite meet our needs. However, there are some options for us.

Living with children who have ADHD, ODD, anxiety issues, or any other out of the ordinary behaviors is difficult and you really do have to take it day by day with little to no expectations of what you are going to get from them every day. The element of surprise is something that could trigger anger in a parent - if something sets your child off that you weren't expecting you have to just go with it and not try and force it. I'm a little bit of a Type A.....so I am trying to re-train myself not to be so controlling. Our children are learning, we are learning......it's not easy, but we will get there. We will get there right?

The same boiling water that hardens the egg will soften the carrot. So it is with children. Everything depends on the individual’s particular reaction to stressful circumstances. ~ Hide or Seek

What is to become of me?

2010-01-25T10:13:00.002-06:00

When I started my blog I never really pinpointed what exactly my purpose was for blogging - frugal living, advice on life, a look at my journey in everyday ordinary life......when people find out I blog they want to know what it's about - well, it's a little bit of everything. I think at the time, whatever my focus is is what I blog about. Well, right now my focus is my family and the challenges that we are facing raising a child with ADHD, anxiety issues, and ODD. In addition to that, there is the thought that our youngest child has ADHD as well, not so much anger driven, but hyperactivity driven. So many challenges as parents right now and I think that I'm going to document our journey here because that is my focus right now.

What I know so far.......I'm tired, I'm tired of looking at my son and not knowing what kind of reaction I will get from him if I ask him to do something. I'm tired of walking on eggshells for fear that one word, one movement, one statement will send him into a rage that will impact our morning, afternoon, and/or evening. And most of all I'm tired of being tested as a mother and I often wonder where the love comes from within me because there are days when I'm getting nothing but hate in return.

We have more psychological evaluations coming up that will give us more of a sense on how to counsel our oldest child, how to parent him, and how his education should be structured. I'm excited, but apprehensive about this - I always fear they are going to come out and say something like "Well, the reason he has these issues are completely and totally your fault". However, the knowing is what's important and what I look forward to the most - I look forward to knowing how we move forward, not so much the "why" of it all.

The challenges of our youngest child are more just being ornery in class, not listening, running around like he's powered by a motor, and I feel like having dealt with the many idiosyncrasies of our oldest have prepared us for these "minor" issues and we can deal with them. However, it doesn't make it any easier to hear a teacher say that she feels there is something wrong with him. That's my baby and I think he's perfect no matter what, I think both of my children are....but it's the judgement of others that I fear the most in this entire situation.

Today I'm refocusing on my life and what each day brings. This morning was difficult and emotional and challenged every being in my body - it challenged our marriage, my relationship between my oldest son and I, and at one point I was crying so hard that I threw up. Not a good way to start my day......but I got through it and I'll get through the evening with my children once I get there. And I'm searching for support groups in our area for parents dealing with similar issues to figure out how my husband and I can get through this.

Day by day as a family we will face these issues and meet them as they come. I know there are good days and bad days with variables of how good and/or how bad.....so in knowing that I feel prepared. I just hope and pray that my children both know that my husband and I love them dearly and will do anything for them - that's how it's always been and how it will always be.

"Making the decision to have a child - it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body." Elizabeth Stone

Never give up. Never ever give up.

2010-01-20T21:13:00.003-06:00

Sometimes in life you have a goal that nags you - it's one of those goals that you set but it's easy to set aside when life comes your way.......pay off all your debt, finish school, lose 10 pounds, run a marathon. Run a marathon? WHAT? Who wants to do that and WHY?

Well, I have always wanted to complete a marathon, not because I'm a super runner and could totally blow everyone out of the water, it's something that I personally would like to accomplish. I just have always said I would like to run one. I watched the documentary "The Spirit of the Marathon" and one of my favorite quotes was "There are people that are competing and there are people that are completing" - and I am in it to complete it and my only competition is myself.

Running has always been a good release for stress.....and if you have read my posts lately, you know that our little family is incredibly stressed at times - so I should be a really GOOD runner! ha! Last year I started training for it and got half-way through and my Lupus flared up and knocked me down for months. I had declared I was running for someone else and felt disappointed when I couldn't complete it.....this year I'm running for myself. I'm running to prove to myself that I have the ability to face a challenge head on and the discipline to prepare for it.

I have in the past run a half-marathon - I did not train for it properly and I was terribly, terribly overweight. I finished it and that's about all I can say - it wasn't pretty and I know that given the opportunity to do it again, I would have prepared my body better for that race. So right now I am registered for the marathon and am going through the training to complete it - given that my Lupus stays quiet I will be able to put a check mark next to "run a marathon" on my "To Do Eventually List". Now....gotta go, gotta get those miles in!

On the road again

2010-01-11T11:27:00.002-06:00

I'm trying to play catch up again....I was gone for a few days celebrating my sister's birthday in Arizona and the kids had snow days and I haven't been feeling well.....so I'm playing catch up with life AGAIN! And we are leaving late Wednesday night to drive to Alabama to visit my parents who are "snow birding" for the first time this year. On the road again.....and this my friends will be the second longest road trip for my little family and I'm a little stressed because the first one was not so fun!

I'm going to take you back to the summer of 2005.....life was very stressful back then with two little ones (2 and 4 years old to be exact), I was running a home daycare business, Randy was terribly busy at his job as a sheet metal worker, and on the side he competed in archery - 3-D Bow Shooting. He qualified for nationals in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania and decided that the entire family should go out on this trip - we would drive and it would be fun!

Our road trip was a 19 hour nightmare due to construction, we left bright and early in the morning - even though I suggested leaving at night so the kiddos would sleep, it rained almost the entire time we were out there - so I was stuck in the hotel room with toddlers, I was in a strange city and would take the children on walks when I could - but was scared I would end up in a bad neighborhood, we barely saw Randy because it's not like you can go into a building and watch their shoots - they are actually walking through the woods, and I believe our marriage was a little shaky upon returning from that trip. We survived and the children have no recollection of their mother having melt downs, trying desperately to entertain them over the long weekend, and I actually think they don't remember the trip at all. My husband remembers competing, because that's what he did majority of the time and has very little memory of the "other" stuff. I however, remember it all.......like it was yesterday! ha!

Now, I believe that we are given challenges and that we take from them things that we're supposed to learn. I was supposed to learn patience and compassion and it taught me that as a mother I was capable of driving my children around in a strange city and finding ways to entertain them and making it seem like an adventure! The highlight was going to Hershey, Pennsylvania and I believe the chocolate is in fact what saved me. ha! Again, we all survived and there are little to no scars in the memories of my husband and children in regards to that trip - and I grew up a little bit as a mother, a wife, and a woman.

So, in looking ahead at our up and coming road trip - we are going to drive mostly through the night, the boys both have handheld games, we have a DVD player, a GPS, and the boys who are now almost 5 years older will be able to handle the stresses that come with travelling a little better than they did when they were so young. I am looking forward to my children seeing the ocean, spending time with my parents, sweet tea, fresh seafood, and having a chance to learn from the challenges that might be hidden in our little road trip.

Patience Is A Virtue

2010-01-06T14:03:00.002-06:00

My patience was tested on January 2nd while trying to travel to Phoenix with my niece and nephew for my sister's surprise 40th birthday party. We were scheduled to leave Bloomington on Air Tran at 5:46 a.m. through Atlanta and arrive in Phoenix at 12:35 p.m. Unfortunately that did not happen and we ended up in Phoenix at 11:30 a.m. on January 3rd. Long story short, I was tested and I believe I handled it all very well and can say that I have been to Phoenix long enough to know that I'm going back there SOON!

In all of the travel madness, I finally got a chance to read almost all of "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert - I am in the homestretch of the book, but have SO many pages marked with quotes for my life that just fit me so well. This was the perfect read for the new year and I am going to leave you with this little snapshot of what I believe to be my mantra for this year. This goes along well with my "I am only going to put my time and energy into the things that matter" goal for this year.

Happy New Year all!

"There is so much about my fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall under the jurisdiction. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I can select what I can read and eat and study. I can choose how I'm going to regard unfortunate circumstances in my life-whether I will see them as curses or opportunities. I can choose my words and the tone of voice in which I speak to others. And most of all, I can choose my thoughts."

I'm here....just trying to organize life a little!

2009-12-29T15:17:00.002-06:00

The whirlwind of Christmas brought lots of gatherings, late nights of wrapping presents, and the hustle and bustle of making sure we were where we needed to be with everything we needed. And with that, I am taking the week off of work to organize things in our home. I get so overwhelmed sometimes with the amount of "stuff" we have in the house and I tend to put it up on a shelf, shut it in a closet, and simply forget about it until I become aware that I could possibly end up on an episode of "Hoarders". ha! Well, it's not that bad, but it could get that way if I don't take time to address issue at least once every few months!

I hope that you and yours had an amazing Christmas season and that the magic of Santa and the blessed birth of Christ gave you a chance to reflect on your life and that you are where you are supposed to be and that you are surrounded by positive family and friends that make you better people. Most of all, my wish for you is that the new year brings you great things in your life. I have a few personal goals that I'm determined to meet this year and I have been overwhelmed with support from my family and friends.....so I'm looking forward to sharing those with you as I meet them.

One of my goals (not mentioned above) for this year is to read a little more. And in starting that already, I read something yesterday that is going to be my quote for this year and I think it's something we can all use to start the new year with - best wishes to you in all that you wish to accomplish this year.

"Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending." Maria Robinson

Living Within Your Means

2009-12-17T10:23:00.003-06:00

This time of year it seems as though every where you turn you are spending money on one thing or another. With much planning and saving we usually do okay and this year is no exception. The bigger the children get, the bigger and more expensive their toys are - so I watch sales very closely, set a budget, and you can always find me out on Black Friday snagging those deals and like this year, I got the shopping done for our children in one day.

I was feeling good about the gifts I purchased for everyone this year, including our children until a friend presented the question yesterday of "How many gifts do you give your children each year?" and in reading the responses I felt a little pang of guilt because some people responded "two" or "a few small gifts and then candy in their stocking".....our children will have several gifts under the tree.....several. Now, I enforce throughout the year and especially this time of year giving to others in need. My children know about the Crisis Nursery in our area and how we donate money to them to help children in need, they go to the Humane Society with me to walk dogs, and they know that the toys and clothes that I frequently package up are going to children that might not be able to have those things otherwise. And during the Christmas season, they are actively involved in church activities and we know that Jesus is the reason for the season. Should I feel guilty about in addition to teaching them giving and compassion for others, that my husband and I spoil them just a little bit with an abundance of gifts?

My husband and I live within our means - our home is nearly 30 years old, our car is a '98, we shop sales, and I'm a little fanatical about being frugal. But when it comes to our kids and Christmas - it's so fun to spoil them just a little bit! And it's not like I go all out and buy them whatever they want at full price.....no way, not me! ha! ha! But in reading the responses I felt a bit of guilt - are we giving them too much?

This morning during my prayers I thought about the phrase "living within your means" and I think that it can be applied to all aspects of life - are you living within your means not only financially, but spiritually, physically, within your relationships, etc. And I think that if you aren't excessive in your life as a whole and you work hard, do for others, and live your life within your means - then at Christmas it's okay to spoil your children just a little.....because nothing gives me more joy than to see the sparkle in their eye and the happiness in their voices when they see that Santa has come to our home and given them gifts. The season is magical because of all aspects and I get sucked into it because it's for my children.

Are you living within your means? Are you meeting the needs of every point in your life? If you are, then you are doing well. If you find there is excess in some areas and a need in others, make a point to make changes. There is nothing that says it's too late to make changes in your life. And after typing all of this out I feel good about how Randy and I are raising our children and on Christmas morning - whether they are getting one present or 100 presents (which, by the way, they're not....not even close) - they will be excited, happy, and full of joy and they will appreciate whatever it is they receive.

What I have learned in my 33rd year

2009-12-16T12:40:00.003-06:00

I'm slowly approaching the age of 34......8 days to be exact......and while I had some time for reflection yesterday I realized that I learned a lot about relationships this year. Ever since I started really looking at my life as a journey each year has taught me a lot about one particular thing - one year it was a year of self-discovery, one year focused a lot on my marriage, another year focused on being healthy, etc. And this year has been all about the ins and outs of relationships as a whole.

Here are some recaps of the life lessons I have learned this year:

Always give everyone the benefit of the doubt. There is a saying that I love and it's "Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle" and it's so true.
Don't give up too much of yourself for someone else's happiness. This is a little tricky and I often find myself taking on too much for others and some times I spread myself a little too thin and as result I get stressed and overwhelmed.
Learn to say no.
When someone challenges your character, while it might feel necessary to respond, goodness, kindness, and true friendship will shine through all the time. Hold your head up high and carry yourself with dignity and grace.
Adversity builds character.
Friendships should be the least stressful relationship in your life - nothing is better than sitting around with your true friends and laughing, talking, venting, crying, and figuring out that everyones lives are crazy and that you're normal!
There is a huge difference when someone is creating their life story vs. living their life story. Don't create your life story, live your life story every day - living the life you were meant to live means that you are living every day with honesty.
Change can be good, letting go is hard, and the truth does hurt.
Being a good friend means following this.....the more you see, the less you should speak; the less you speak, the more you hear.
When someone threatens your character, their character is threatened.

As you can see.....I have learned some tough lessons in regards to relationships and I know that in my life journey I will learn so much more. However, in this new year, my goal is to pay less attention to the people/things that don't mean as much to me and more attention to the people/things that mean the most to me. The white noise that sometimes inflicts our lives shouldn't affect our life - if you don't pay any attention to it, eventually it will blend in to the background.

I am looking forward to the wisdom, the challenges, the moments that will define me, and oh so much happiness in my life this year. I never really thought about where I was going to be at the age of 34 and I think that I was meant to be right where I am at this moment.

God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

2009-12-03T13:20:00.002-06:00

One of my favorite songs during the holiday season - the mentions of comfort and joy; and the mention of true love and brotherhood always bring me to the true meaning of Christmas. In our community we have a place called the Crisis Nursery where children can find a safety net during times of strife in their lives. Single parents have a partner in childcare, home visits by counselors to assist with making sure their child/children are developing in the manner they are supposed to, and the Crisis Nursery meets the needs of children by helping to supply diapers, formula, etc.

In an effort to support the Crisis Nursery our family makes it an annual tradition to shop at the holiday shop where our children go in with their list and their money and they buy for us. They get to choose from donated gifts and it's sometimes very interesting when you open your gifts on Christmas day.....my husband got a toy golf set from Noah last year and it was just something that Noah had actually wanted for himself! ha! Logan, our oldest child, puts more thought into it than Noah and is very sweet with the gifts he chooses.

I am happy to report that Logan's 2nd grade class has decided to give gifts to the Crisis Nursery this year in lieu of doing a gift exchange. Logan was familiar with their holiday shop and the concept behind it, so he was really excited about this. And as a mother I am really happy that the concept of the "season of giving" is being taught in other places in my children's lives because there is a better chance of the message getting through! ha!

I urge you to find places in your area that do similar things - there are always bell ringers, the angel tree at the mall, serving food at shelters - whatever is appropriate for your children and family. Find a way to bring the message of true love and brotherhood into your traditions during the holiday season. I know that it's not always easy and if you have fallen on hard times yourself, don't forget that these resources are out there if you need them. Just don't forget to pay it forward when you get back on your feet. ; )

Recipe For Joy

2009-12-02T11:13:00.002-06:00

I am a firm believer in giving your time and efforts to charities all the time, however, around Christmas I think it's especially important because I simply cannot imagine my children waking up Christmas morning and having nothing under the tree and no food in the pantry. The thought of any child having to live through that is painful.

We have always made due and had a rough spot in our lives where I didn't know if we would be able to afford much for the children at Christmas. At that time Wal-Mart still did layaway and I don't think we could have managed if I hadn't been able to do that. Our children never knew how stretched we were and how we scrimped and saved to put those gifts under the tree - all they know is that they had a great Christmas that year.

With that I have been inspired by another blogger, Dawn at Because I Said So, to participate in “Recipe for Joy” through Kraft. Kraft Foods has teamed up with Feeding America to donate up to one million meals to needy families this holiday season. For every free e-card sent, Kraft Foods will donate 10 meals to Feeding America. Which is very cool and would be a blessing to many families.

All you have to do is go HERE and send a free holiday greetings e-card to your friends, family, coworkers, etc. and they will get a nice personalized greeting from you. PLUS, for every e-card sent, Kraft will donate 10 meals to Feeding America - so send as many as you can because they are donating up to one million meals.

Feeding America directly supports 205 member food banks and Kraft Foods is a long standing partner of Feeding America. Over the last 25 years, Kraft Foods has contributed $770 million in funding and food to support Feeding America and other hunger relief initiatives worldwide. By partnering with organizations, such as Feeding America, Kraft Foods provides much-needed food to hungry people throughout the United States. For more information about Feeding America, log on to http://www.feedingamerica.org/.

Living your life outloud

2009-12-01T17:52:00.002-06:00

I have nothing to hide, I am an open book and I heard the term "Living Your Life Outloud" today and I think it describes me very well. I don't mind telling you what I think, feel, am going through.....like I said, I have nothing to hide. My marriage isn't perfect, my kids are sometimes a little nutty, I make mistakes, etc. - I'm normal - at least that's what one of my voices has told me! ha! But I live my life outloud and I don't feel bad about it.

My husband on the other hand, feels that I should be less open with putting out there that our child has ADHD with anxiety tendencies, or that our marriage isn't perfect, or that I'm even having a bad day. I don't know if this is because he's a guy who burps when he's happy, farts when his tummy is full, and grunts as a form of communication. I'm just kidding, he talks sometimes! ; ) He is technically challenged and he doesn't fully understand social networks or blogging - he just doesn't get why anyone would care that I'm hungry and looking for lunch ideas.

And I have to wonder, am I putting myself or my family at risk by living my life outloud? This goes back to my question of are we making ourselves too available to the masses and revealing personal information about ourselves that we might not otherwise reveal to others? I think that the extent of information you reveal is indicative of the kind of person you are in real life, not just virtually. If I wasn't on social networks or blogging and we were standing next to each other in line at the grocery store, I just might reveal to you that I'm hungry for a cheeseburger or that my son has ADHD.....I live my life that way - I have nothing to hide and I feel like in sharing the stories of my life might help others who are feeling the same way.

I have a friend who follows politics closely and has strong opinions about how things are run in the United States and she's not afraid to tell you how she feels. I have another friend who is very Christian and is not afraid to tell you if you are not following the word of God or offers you a bible verse to get you through a tough spot. These friends live their lives outloud and I don't think it's harming anyone, if anything I've learned so much from these women. But others that choose not to voice their opinions on politics or religion might take offense to what these women reveal.

I think that if you are active in an organization, or there is something that you are passionate about that you should voice this to others. If you have nothing to hide in your life and are proud of everything, including all of your flaws, you should share your stories so that people around you can look to you as a source of information or support. I love my husband and sons and am so proud of them all - are they flawed? Yes. Should they be judged for that? Absolutely not. But I do think that sometimes one can reveal too much about themselves and maybe live a little too outloud. And I do hope that I don't do that, I hope that the volume of information that I provide is not too loud - because I would never want to jeopardize my family, I've done that before and it's not a moment that I'm proud of.

Technology Overload

2009-11-29T08:00:00.000-06:00

I have been thinking about this a lot lately....how does technology influence your life? Is it a positive or a negative or a little of both? I feel a little overwhelmed sometimes by e-mails, texting, social networks, blogging and everything that comes with it. Because of technology we are accessible to our family, friends, and world wide web acquaintances literally 24 hours a day/7 days a week. Is that healthy? Does that leave us with any time for our life outside of technology? Don't we need at least the commute home to unwind, shut out the world, and quiet our minds?

And in addition to being completely accessible to everyone, how do we handle "tech rejection"? You know what I'm talking about - someone deletes you from a social network, someone you send a text or e-mail to doesn't respond, and a person you know that has their phone with them all the time doesn't answer your call. This is a new form of rejection and I had a difficult enough time dealing with rejection in real life and now I have to deal with this? How do you respond to this new type of rejection? Is there a "Living Your Life Through Technology For Dummies".

Technology allows people to be more candid and ruthless than they might otherwise be in person. People feel less inhibited with their words and I think because the person isn't standing in front of you its easier to be brutally honest and forget that the words on the screen are creating an emotional reaction. Social networks are rampant with teenage angst and bullying and this goes for adults too.....people put themselves out there and sometimes the reactions aren't kind.

I do feel like technology has helped me stay connected to people that I might not otherwise hear from unless it was through the mail or over the phone and for that I am thankful. But on the negative side I have to wonder if I have made myself too accessible to others? Have I enabled others to affect me in a negative way because they have deleted me from a social network site, or never answer my texts/e-mails/phone calls? Have I revealed too much about my life, my family, my dysfunctions and put more judgement on myself or my family?

Are you on technology overload? In our efforts to simplify our lives can we live without technology? And if so, how do we manage these types of relationships if they can disappear as quickly as you hit the delete button?

Set your goals and just go

2009-11-26T08:26:00.002-06:00

"Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told: 'I'm with you kid. Let's go.'" Maya Angelou

I know that New Year's Eve is the time for people to make resolutions for the new year with hopes to change the events in their life that they didn't like and make it all better. But I believe that at any time you can set a goal for yourself and "just do it". I dabble in eating right and exercising, it's one of those things that if I have time for it I do it and but it's not consistent. I notice this mainly when I go to put on something that could show off toned arms I want to scream because my arms are not tone and are creeping up slowly to the dreaded "Hello Mary Arms". **sound the Psycho shower scene music here**

I am a working mother and a wife and I am busy with everyone else's life it seems and I am making it a goal from this day forward to schedule time for me. I am going to take time to take care of myself and to eat right and exercise regularly. Now....I am having this epiphany on Thanksgiving Day - a day when I will attend two family celebrations and eat so much crap that Randy will roll me home. AND I am doing this during the cold months which is when my Lupus flares up the most. But I am determined to take control of this desire to be fit and follow through with it.

Now, in doing this I have documented that I am making this pact with myself to make an effort to workout religiously and to eat right. I am so inspired by my Facebook friends that workout religiously and they are just as busy, if not busier than me......so for that I am thankful. Today before I eat all of the great food at each family celebration I am going to workout and I will let the kids know that during that 45-60 minute time period it's my time and unless they are bleeding, leave me alone! ha!

So if you have had some goals in mind start them today....take charge of your life and make something happen for yourself. You can do it and I will support you 100% of the way.

What I am thankful for

2009-11-25T11:42:00.003-06:00

I know, it sounds like a cheesy grade school essay, but in thinking about my life today I realized how much I have to be thankful for. Life is so hectic and crazy sometimes and we just forget about how blessed we really are. We become so wrapped up in the chaos of marriage, parenting, work, extra-curricular activities that some times it is so important to stop and look around at the life around you and appreciate each and every moment.

I feel like every person in my life makes me a better person and I am so thankful with everything that I've been given in my life - life gives you what you give it and because of my solid foundation and the great people that I've surrounded myself with that I have been given a great life. This year on Thanksgiving Day and every day following tell the people around you how thankful you are to have them in your life. Nobody is perfect, but if you surround yourself with goodness that's what you will get in return. Happy Thanksgiving everyone - I wish you many blessings today, tomorrow, and always.

"In every person who comes near you look for what is good and strong; honor that; try to imitate it, and your faults will drop off like dead leaves when their time comes." John Ruskin

Before you point your finger, stop and look at how many fingers are pointing back at you.

2009-11-20T15:57:00.004-06:00

Sound advice from the Christian radio station that I frequently listen to. I have found myself in situations recently where there has been a lot of finger pointing and I've had to stop myself from pointing back because I know that I am not perfect and I'm willing to accept myself for who I am. I look at the individuals who have done the finger pointing and know that deep down I am the scapegoat for their life issues - does it bother me? A little. Does it change me? Not anymore. I am a grown woman, a wife, a mother.....I have the weight of my own life on my shoulders and refuse to carry anyone else's.

When you point your finger at someone think about the real reason you are doing it. Are you just really unhappy in your own life and it's easier than facing your own problems? I know I'm guilty of doing that - it's easier to point out someone else's flaws rather than really looking at your own. Nobody is perfect and I have found in my journey through life that sometimes it's so much easier to laugh at yourself and say "I'm an idiot, I'm so sorry for what I said/did, etc." and everyone can move on. Accepting yourself, flaws and all is not a simple life lesson and can some times be a very difficult pill to swallow - but it means your human.

I recently had someone tell me something that was being said about me and I didn't react to it like they thought I should - I just took it all in and said "If that's what they think, that's fine, but I know the truth" and they acted as if I should create a scene, a confrontation, clear the air.....but like I said, I know the truth and the truth is what will carry me through any situation. Would I feel better screaming and yelling and carrying on? Not really, maybe for a moment, but screaming at someone at my age just makes me look crazy - ha!

So if you are in a situation right now where fingers are being pointed at you, terrible things are being said, and your character is being challenged - look at the source, look at the real reason they are doing what they are doing. Are they so incredibly unhappy and miserable in their own life that they are willing to put you out there so nobody will really look at them? Probably. Stand strong, be your own person, and be comfortable with the truth.

Some things don't warrant a response and I have had to bite my tongue many many times this past year in different situations - and it's for the best. I am comfortable with myself, my flawed, imperfect self, that is in a marriage that at times seems so dysfunctional, with children that are far from Peter and Bobby Brady, and family that is just sometimes laughably insane.

Don't you look at me so smug
And say I'm going bad.
Who are you to judge me
And the life that I live?

I know that I'm not perfect
And that I don't claim to be.
So before you point your fingers,
Be sure your hands are clean.

Judge not
Before you judge yourself.
Judge not
If you're not ready for judgement. Woah oh oh!

The road of life is rocking
And you may stumble too.
So while you talk about me,
someone else is judging you.

**Bob Marley**

Wholey Chicken Batman

2009-11-18T10:48:00.002-06:00

I have to admit, I've been a chicken snob for many years - if it wasn't boneless/skinless chicken breast I wanted no part of it. Well, along my journey to frugalness, I have found that you can have chicken without the major hit on your pocket book! When I see bone-in chicken breasts on sale for $0.88/lb. I get super excited! I know now how to remove the skin, cut the meat of the bone and package it up in the freezer for another day......woo hoo! AND if you are like I was and you're buying those bags of chicken breasts.....they are full of sodium because they're frozen in basically a salt water bath - just a side note for those of you trying to lose weight.

More recently I have discovered whole chickens.....initially I thought - what the heck am I going to do with a whole chicken? Well, at $0.49/lb. I was willing to learn! I have made several meals out of a whole chicken along with chicken stock.

Here is what I have learned from SO many of the great blogs that I rely on -

Step #1 - place the whole chicken in the crock pot with celery, onions, carrots, salt, pepper, a little pat of butter and about 1/2 cup of water. Let cook 8 -10 hours.

Step #2 - remove the chicken from the crock pot and let cool - remove skin and bones and return all of that to the crock pot (instructions for that will follow). With the meat you have from the chicken, shred it up and package it into 1lb. packages (or whatever you like). The last time I did this I ended up with four little baggies of chicken. Go through this really well with your fingers - chicken bones can be little. Put in the freezer and save for future use.

Step #3 - all of the stuff in the crock pot will now be made into a rich, beautiful chicken stock! Just fill the crock pot with water - leaving all the skin, bones, left over veggies in there and leave it on low for 8 - 10 hours. After it cools a bit, you can strain out all of the garbage and package up the chicken broth into whatever portion size you would like and stick in the freezer for a rainy day.

A 5lb. chicken that cost me $2.45 can go a really long way - 4 packages of shredded meat and 8 containers of chicken stock. I think that's a great bargain and it's so healthy for all of us!

Why am I talking about whole chickens today....I got a call from my child's school that our youngest was running a fever. In addition to that he is stuffed up and has a bit of a cough. So, in a victorious "planning ahead, best mommy in the world" moment - after I made him a bed on the couch and got him settled, I was able to whip up a batch of homemade chicken noodle soup using two packages of broth, two cups of water, some sauteed garlic/onion/carrot, a package of shredded chicken, and a bag of egg noodles. I know I feel better.....and I'm hoping that he will too.

So far I have used the chicken to make white bean chicken chili and the homemade chicken noodle soup, but it can be used in enchiladas, a casserole, etc. - just like I learned with a small chuck roast that I found way back in my freezer.....alone it's not enough to feed my family, but mixed with things it can make a meal. (You might have already known that, but I am still on my journey to frugalness! ha!)

I hope you have a happy and healthy day and remember to not be so snotty when it comes to cooking, branch out - sometimes you might surprise yourself!

Frugal Christmas Shopping Continued

2009-11-16T15:36:00.003-06:00

I am trying to be very conscious of the fact that I have gifts to buy for Christmas.....I would love to spend on myself with all of the sales going on now, but I just can't justify it.....well, maybe I can a little! ha!

I received a coupon last week that I could use at any Gap/Old Navy/Banana Republic store, including outlet stores - it was 30% off your entire purchase with 5% going to the Leukemia/Lymphoma Society. I nearly fell over with joy given that I had come to terms with the fact that I needed to really go out and try on jeans. Not that I've changed sizes, I WISH WISH WISH I would go down just one little, teensy, bitty size....but I haven't shopped for jeans in forever and many times I find myself just grabbing the size I need from wherever and get home to find that they are Ultra Skinny, Low Waist, Not Meant For Mommies That Have Hips and Bend Over A lot Picking Up Whatnot From The Floor Jeans that don't provide me with the fit that I need.

So after I worked the Illini football game on Saturday I found myself with a few hours before I was scheduled to meet some girls out and about and I took advantage of the beautiful weather to travel to the local outlet mall. Armed with my coupon my first stop was Gap.....this is my style, I love their clothes and have for a long time and they were having decent sales on Saturday. I tried on 6 pair of jeans total and ended up buying 3 pair for around $25 each!

My next mission was Old Navy....this time not for me, but for my boys for Christmas! I wanted to get them each robes and jammies - no luck in that department. However, all fleece was Buy One Get One Free and I got them each fleece pullovers, waffle shirts and boxers for under the tree and in their stockings, I'm sure they will be thrilled - but the pullovers ended up being about $5.00 each and I like them, so there! ; )

I ended up going back to Gap and bought them robes originally priced at $29.99 for $15.00 - they have a skull on it, which seems to be on EVERYTHING for boys - so they'll be excited!

I also got a chance to go to a Pampered Chef party on Friday and actually bought a great gift for a family gift exchange that I'm in.....I won't list the contents just in case my family reads this! BUT, if you get invited to a home party like Tastefully Simple, Lia Sophia, Pampered Chef, etc., figure out who is on your list that might enjoy something from those companies and you can give your friend the benefit of purchasing from his/her party and mark someone off your list!

If you are looking for any bargains this week - Gap Outlet has their fleece marked 50% off and I know that hats, scarves, and gloves/mittens are great gifts for any teenage girls you might have on your list? And sweatshirts are always a great gift for boys.

I haven't officially made my shopping list for this year, I've done a rundown in my head of who I know we have to buy for, etc., but I need to really get that done or else I will overbuy and that's just not very frugal! ha! Happy shopping!

A good cry

2009-11-13T12:04:00.002-06:00

This morning was a morning of monumental tears. One of those mornings when everything just built up and built up and built up and I finally had it. The source of my stress was our oldest son Logan who has been battling with a diagnoses of anxiety/ADD for the past few months and we're going through a whole gamut of things for him to help him and it's difficult to know how to parent him without losing it every second of the day!

The thing that has been getting to me lately is how he blames every single one of his problems on someone else and I'm trying to get him to take responsibility for his own actions which is a life lesson that I think is so important. If you know you've made a mistake, admit it, apologize, learn from it and move on. I know that's difficult at 8 years old, it's difficult at 33 years old, but it has to be learned. I had it this morning, I had enough of the bad attitude, talking down to his younger brother, and then blaming the whole fight on his younger brother and I yelled at him. I sent him to his room and I yelled at him about taking responsibility and knowing when it was his fault, etc. He talked back to me and told me that he wanted to run away and I told him that there were days that I wanted to run away from problems, but that is no way to solve them. By then I was in tears......an emotional sobbing mess and we were running late for school/work.

I know that we are doing what's best for him by going through the treatments we are for his anxiety/ADD - but I need to figure out how I can parent him the best without losing my cool. I do very well given the situation and I remain calm through a lot of things, but this morning I had one thing on top of another and another and I lost it. I know I should walk away, I know I should count to 10, etc., but the words came out and in that moment I felt like I needed to convey how blaming others was not the solution. Now for the remainder of the day I am left with the guilt that I yelled at my child before school, I upset him before he went to a place that he struggles with anyway.

Motherhood is difficult, parenting is not easy, I know how I felt as a child when I had a bad morning with my mom and I know that this will be one out of a million bad mornings I will have with Logan. I also know that I have friends who would give anything to have even my worst day with my child because their child has passed away and again, I feel guilty for even feeling guilty! So I had a good cry, on the way to work as I was putting my make-up on in the car AGAIN, I cried hoping that I would feel better. And 5 hours later, I still feel like crap about it.....I just realized that today is Friday the 13th, maybe this is just my dumb luck.

How do you handle walking back into your house after having a fight with your child or your spouse? If you are the parent of a child going through anxiety/ADD issues, how have you made changes to your parenting strategies?

A few of my favorite things

2009-11-09T12:23:00.004-06:00

Oprah has her favorite things and so in the spirit of that, I thought I would blog about a few of my favorite things. Things that have made my life easier and more manageable as a wife and mother!

1. Aveeno - I love love love Aveeno products including skin and hair! I had coupons for their shampoo this summer and thought I would give it a try and I was very happy with how my hair felt and as a mother I know you can relate to not being able to wash your hair every day and this shampoo/conditioner keeps your hair and scalp clean and not greasy for at least two days. I have used their facial cleanser and lotion for some time and I've always been very happy with how light and fresh they are and how my skin feels afterwards.

I always have Aveeno oatmeal bath on hand because I find that it helps when I have flare ups with my Lupus and develop skin rashes. Plus I have two little boys who are always in something out in the yard.....like Saturday when Logan was playing football and rolling around in the yard and came screaming into the house that his arms itched.

2. Tide Laundry Detergent - I know that I made my own laundry detergent for some time in an effort to save money and I just have to say that I wasn't happy with how it cleaned our clothes. I started back to detergent and immediately went for what was on sale, what I had coupons for, and scoffed at the higher price of Tide. Well, I wasn't happy with the stains that remained on our kids' clothes and one day I convinced myself to try Tide to see if I would be happy with it, even at the higher price. I was sold....the grass stains, the dirt, the random stains that seem to find our boys.....gone! GONE!

I did use the powdered version with a coupon and have been told to try the coldwater kind, which I will do when I run out because I do use warm water which adds to the electricity bill. I justify this because I would like the our clothes to last and if I have to wash clothes multiple times to get one stain out, then I think it all evens out. Plus you can't beat the smell of good laundry detergent!

3. Dryer Max Dryer Balls - I bought these with the recommendation from one of the blogs that I read on how to save money. I believe the blog was about how to save money on fabric softener, but I saw an opportunity to save money on electricity. We have an electric dryer and it just didn't seem to dry our clothes after one time, there were times when we would have to run it two or even three times. So, on a whim I purchased these and I get almost giddy when I open the dryer and find that they have helped the clothes evenly dry after one time.

For around $10.00 these are supposed to last 2 - 5 years and I am just really happy with them because they are going to save money on electricity, the wear and tear of our dryer, and eliminate fabric softeners.

4. All You Magazine - This magazine is awesome for coupons! You can find the magazine on the Wal-Mart shelves or you can visit the website All You for online coupon deals and subscription information. The magazine pays for itself in the amount of coupons you will find. I believe in August it had over $90 worth of coupons in it....plus money saving tips for beauty, home, food, etc. I don't buy magazines because you can find free magazine deals all over the internet, but I do buy this one! I highly recommend it!

5. Rimmel Make-up - I first spotted Rimmel at Wal-Mart awhile ago and I loved the products and the low cost for them. Rimmel is now at other stores along with Walgreens and can be found many times for buy one get one free or buy one get one at 50% off. AND you can find coupons for these products in the Sunday flyer of your local newspaper as well as All You magazine.

6. Tresemme Hair Products - For many years I used high priced salon hair products that I felt that I couldn't live without....until I had children and a budget. I tried a lot of hair products found on Wal-mart shelves that just didn't hold my hairstyle or provide me with the same happiness as the salon products. I felt like the pomades were waxy and heavy on my hair and the hair sprays were scary sticky and the hold was terrible. And then one day I tried Tresemme hair spray and was thrilled with how it held my style and how light it was. And when they came out with a pomade I just knew it would be good and I was right! I also use their mousse and have always been happy with how light it is and how it gives my hair volume.

They are right when they say salon quality.....it really is and it's not hard on your budget.

7. Lia Sophia Jewelry - I am not a terribly girlie girl, but I do love jewelry to accessorize with. I have bought cheap jewelry at the mall, but I wear it once and it tarnishes or breaks and it's frustrating. Well a friend of mine hosted a Lia Sophia party and when I went to it and started trying things on I fell in love! And the prices weren't bad at all, but then they had incentives like buy two get one free and then I read about the hostess incentives and was sold....I wanted this jewelry and I could get it for free!

On top of that, if you save your receipts for the items you order, there is a lifetime guarantee and you can return them for the price of the item and can use that credit for purchasing/replacing your jewelry. Go to their website at www.liasophia.com for a representative near you. **Disclaimer** I don't sell the jewelry - I am just a really big fan!

8. Arnold Bread - Bread in your favorite things? Really? Yes! I love this bread so much that I am giving it a shout out! I am a big fan of feeding my children the best things possible and in a perfect world they would get the correct serving of fruits, vegetables and whole grains....but as we know, our world isn't perfect! Arnold Bread makes a double fiber bread that is great tasting AND my kids will eat it! I get almost giddy knowing that they are eating whole grains AND fiber. I have looked up recipes for good homemade bread, but I don't have a bread making machine and I don't foresee purchasing one in the near future. I can usually find coupons for Arnold bread and I can buy a loaf of the double fiber bread for $1.78 at Wal-Mart when it's not on sale in another store.

9. Free Music and Television websites - I don't have a DVR....I know *gasp* - but I know that I can go to Hulu and catch up on some of the shows that I missed during the week for FREE. I have also found great shows for the kids that I sometimes let them watch as they are eating breakfast because we don't have a television in the kitchen.....I know *another gasp*!

Along those same lines, I love Pandora! You can create your own radio station with your favorite songs and it's FREE! I have discovered new artists and songs by using this website and if you create an account it saves your radio stations and you can just pick out what you're in the mood to listen to that day!

10. Febreze Home Scents - I really love Yankee candles and I will buy them if they are on sale or if I have a coupon. The scents are rich and they make your whole house smell so good. But they are pricey and I usually give them as gifts rather then use them in my own home.

At some point this summer I had a coupon for a Febreze candle and I gave it a shot. Boy was I happy with it! I use Febreze sprays in my home to freshen it up and really like those and I was so pleased with the candle! I then discovered the entire Home Collection products offered by Febreze - home sprays, soy candles, reed diffusers, and flameless candles. This fall when I was getting the itch for pumpkin scented candles I went with all Febreze products and have been really happy with them. I noticed the displays recently of the Christmas scents out and although I'm not ready for those yet (I'm still in love with my Autumn scents), I am looking forward to seeing what they have to offer!

You can find coupons for these products all the time and they priced for those of us that are budgeting and offer high quality similar to Yankee candles.

The Truth Police

2009-11-06T16:41:00.002-06:00

As parents we have to come up with creative ways to keep our kids "in check". And while I was doing home daycare I dealt with a lot of lying.....nobody fessed up to coloring on my newly painted walls with red crayon, or breaking the toy, or putting a sucker in Bailey's hair, but those things happened and nobody ever came forward and said "I did it Ms. Angela, I'm so sorry". In my world that's what would have happened, but unfortunately that's not the case.

One day while dealing with my own children lying and creating a hectic situation I had a light bulb moment.....one of those parenting moments when you are reaching for SOMETHING that will work. I was tired of threatening Santa, I was tired of talking about God's rules, and I came up with a milder version of the police. The Truth Police were created by me for the ~~sake of my sanity~~ good of the children.

What exactly were the Truth Police, well, they were created at the spur of a moment and I kind of went with the following....the Truth Police know when someone has lied and they will make a report about it and if it's bad enough or if someone continues to lie they could take you to jail. At the time my son Noah was terrified of chickens and upon hearing this he cried and said "Are there chickens in jail", to which I shook my head and said "Yep, there are chickens in jail".

I have the telephone number for the Truth Police and I can call them any time I think the children are lying about something.....as soon as I pick up the phone one of them fesses up to things I didn't even know they did and the other one cries because they don't want their brother to go to jail. One of my kids asked a daycare parent if they knew about the Truth Police and without missing a beat she said "Yep, they hand you that number in the hospital when babies are born". ha! ha! I had an accomplice!

The Truth Police have morphed over the years and now I don't find myself threatening them so much. I look back now and think that the creation of the Truth Police was my tool in teaching my children to make good choices, at least I hope so. Or it could be the thing that lands them in therapy.....that and chickens! Sometimes you have to think so quickly about how to handle a situation as a parent that you come up with surprisingly creative things. As I go into this weekend I hope to not need the Truth Police, they have helped me many of times, but I would just like a peaceful weekend.....maybe I should create the Peace Police?

Happy Parenting!

The Reinhart Opera

2009-11-05T21:24:00.002-06:00

I just recently read on Facebook that someone's child listened to classical music while doing his homework. I used to do this and so I thought I would give it a try with my own children. I pulled up Pandora and chose the classical music station and thought for sure it would immediately bring calm into homework time.....boy was I wrong!

I felt immediately like I was in a terrible opera....a tragic one. Picture our family in opera singing voices -

"Sit down at the table please"
"Please sit doooowwwwwnnnnnnn"
"Homework is stupid! Homework is stupid! Stupid Stupid Stupid!"

"This book is hard! Mommy this book is hard!"
"Please just try, just try just try just try"

"Please redo that one you wrote that backwards"
"No mommy"
"Yes, do it now....do it now or you will be GROUNDED"
"No No No"
"You are GROOOOOUUUUUNNNNNDED"

I don't know that it helped calm the environment at all, but I did it again tonight.....maybe it just helped me chuckle a little as we were suffering through it! ha!

Teach your children well

2009-11-03T10:53:00.003-06:00

One of my favorite blogs to read daily is Here's The Diehl and she has encouraged her fellow bloggers to put down their shiny happy persona's for one day and reveal their flaws. Oh Lord, we could be here all day! ha! ha! I have had to come to terms with my flaws and it seems like with every stage of life there is always a moment when you figure out that you're not perfect in some way.

A friend of mine and I recently had a chance to talk to one another about things that we've been going through with our children and some of the revelations that we've had in our own lives. And I said that I don't want to protect my children from disappointment and failure, I just want to make sure that I give them the tools to handle those things in the best way possible. And I think that as a parent, you can't expect that you are going to shield your child from the rough times, but you should strive to teach them how to maneuver through them.

Our kids know we're not perfect, on occasion they have seen Randy and I have a "discussion", they have seen me break down and cry, they have witnessed us each fall in our lives, but they have also seen us work through any marital issues, they have seen us dust ourselves off and get back up, so they know that even when times get tough, that there is a way out of it.

Now, I certainly don't expose our kids to more than they can handle at their ages. I definitely wouldn't want my children to have to deal with more than they have the capacity to deal with -they have stresses at that age that they are dealing with.....they certainly don't need an overdose of adult stress. I think in life it's important to give them opportunities to be independent, to learn how to deal with life, etc., but I know of some parents that offer these opportunities too fast and that forces their kids to grow up really soon and they miss out on the childhood stuff.

So every day I strive to be real, I am going to have break downs, I am going to have challenges, and not only am I learning and growing with everything that comes my way, my children are learning how to manage as well. I know it's a little corny, but I can't help of "Teach Your Children Well" by Crosby, Stills, & Nash......

You who are on the road
Must have a code that you can live by
And so become yourself
Because the past is just a good bye.

Teach your children well,
Their father's hell did slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picked, the one you'll know by.

Don't you ever ask them why,
if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.

And you, of tender years,
Can't know the fears that your elders grew by,
And so please help them with your youth,
They seek the truth before they can die.

Can you hear and do you care and
Cant you see we must be free to
Teach your children what you believe in.
Make a world that we can live in.

Teach your parents well,
Their children's hell will slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picked, the one you'll know by.

Don't you ever ask them why,
if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.

Blog hunting for deals

2009-10-29T08:51:00.002-05:00

Since I'm a deer hunter's wife, I thought I would make a play on words to represent MY type of hunting. I am a bargain hunter and it's not because I'm cheap, it's because you can have the best in life for less money.....it just takes a little investigative work! One way that I "hunt" for bargains is by checking out blogs. Some of these women put so much time and effort into finding the best for less, that I thought it would be really cool to promote their blogs!

I am listing here my Top #5 money saving blogs - enjoy!

Consumer Queen - Melissa started her blog for fun, then it became a necessity when her husband fell ill and the medical bills were high. She has great tips, always has awesome contests, and promotes high quality items for great prices! The link I posted here is regarding a contest through Frigidaire and a chance to win a year's supply of Tide! I hope that some of my readers can benefit from her frugal shopping and enjoy her witty sense of humor!

The Happy Housewife - Happy is a military wife and mother to seven children.....I love her tips for saving money by using what you have, good recipes, and funny stories! She and her husband live debt free....something I long for - no house payment, car payment, student loans......maybe one day! The link I provided you with is regarding food storage - something I am always learning about because it pains me to throw away food that could have been frozen, canned, etc. - it's like throwing away money! I hope her household tips and humor help you in your life!

The Grocery Cart Challenge - Gayle is a home schooling mother who feeds her family of 6 on $60 a week.....I know right?! She is amazing! She and her husband left their high paying jobs and started their own business and along the way she learned great tips/tricks on how to stay within that budget and still feed their family well. The link I am posting is her "confession" of if she always stay on her menu plan or not. You must read her blog, she is so funny and gives amazing tips for everything from beauty, laundry, clothing, and of course food.

Addicted To Savings - Elisa started her blog as a way to document their journey from living with family to owning their own home. Now she maintains her blog to share some of the great deals that she finds along the way and I have found some of the best deals on her sight! The link I am posting is one for a $5.00 rebate from Real Simple magazine....and I happen to have coupons for many of the products listed! Make sure to check her blog weekly, if not daily for amazing deals at local stores!

Frugal Finds From Your Frugal Friend - Carol is a wonderfully funny lady that blogs about great store deals, recipes, and just humor of life! I have found really good deals, offers, etc. through her and know you would enjoy her blog. The link I have provided here is for natural ways to fight off the flu....tips we could certainly all use right now! Enjoy her blog!

Let the holiday shopping begin!

2009-10-28T15:11:00.004-05:00

I officially kicked off my holiday shopping a few weeks ago. For the sake of keeping the gifts a surprise to those that will receive them, I thought I would just offer up a few tips on how you can save money this holiday season. And would love it if you would offer up some of your ideas on how you save money on gift giving, etc.

#1 Coupons - I use coupons for everything, not just groceries! Go to the websites of the stores you frequent and sign up for their e-mail alerts - they will almost always send you coupons! I always sign up for e-mails at the store when they ask you because the more you shop there, the better the coupons! Today I saved money at both Kohl's and Yankee Candle simply because I signed up for e-mail alerts.

#2 Buy on sale - I know, common sense right? Well, I didn't always buy things on sale and could KICK myself for that! And if you didn't already know this, buying on sale while using coupons - total money saver right there! While at Kohl's I bought my children toys that were on sale and used my coupons....$40 worth of toys for $5!

And speaking of on sale....someone I know wondered if it was bad to give their children stuff they had purchased from a garage sale. Personally I think that is completely fine, children don't know the difference and if they are happy and playing with it, isn't that all that matters? We gave our son a Rescue Heroes ship one Christmas that was given to us and it lasted through both of our children, daycare children, and was sold in a garage sale to MORE children.

#3 Outlets - We live close to an outlet mall and a few weeks ago a friend of mine and I went shopping there and there were deep discounts on so many things. I love Bath & Body products and will only buy those from the outlet, unless they are having a HUGE sale in the regular store. The body scrub that I love is $4.99 in the outlet store and it's normally $20 in the regular store. I go through their 99 cent bins and put things together for a gift basket or stocking stuffers. I think for Christmas I am going to put together little gifts of anti-bacterial items for all of the boys teachers. And while we were shopping, there was an offer to donate $1 to the Susan G. Koman foundation and get 25% off your purchase. So look for those offers that will save you a little bit and benefit a good cause.

#4 Make a list (and check it twice - ha!) - I have been listening to the boys talk about toys they would like lately and jotting them down. Randy and I set a budget for the holidays and we'll go through that list and see just what we can buy for that set amount. And I have a running list of everyone we are going to buy for and definitely make sure I put down on that list when I've purchased something for them! Nothing worse than losing track of your list and overbuying for someone!

We shop on Black Friday and with our list we go through the ads and see where we could get the best deal and we map out a game plan. I'm all about lists, planning, and organizing....you can maximize your budget if you a put a little extra time/effort into it.

#5 Use self-control - Noah has been saying lately that he wants a robe after his shower and while I could just run out and get one for him now, I have to stop myself and remember that it would make a great Christmas gift! We try our best not to spoil our kids with whatever they want, whenever they want......but I'm married to a big kid who can justify buying toys almost as good as I can justify buying shoes! ha! ha! But, we definitely try and buy them things they need throughout the year and then spoil them around the holidays!

#6 Don't forget the reason for the season - I think the best lesson around the holidays is to give more than you get. So volunteering is super important, we have the kids shop for us through a local organization that benefits families in crisis and all the proceeds go towards that, we bake lots and lots of treats to share with others, and we spend a lot of time talking about Jesus and his birthday. Giving your time is free and I think that is certainly the most budget friendly gift ever!

This certainly won't be my last post regarding the holidays.....I'm just gearing up! What are your plans for this season.....gift giving strategies, money saving ideas, recipes.

A soldier's father words on bringing his son home

2009-10-21T16:12:00.002-05:00

In honor of Sgt. Christopher Rudzinski I am sharing with you the words that his father Mike wrote regarding their travel to Dover Air Force base to bring their fallen son home. My heart sinks knowing that Natalie and Mike are grieving the loss of another child. My heart sinks even further knowing that Caroline and Ryan are facing the future without a husband and a father. My prayers are with this amazing family today, tomorrow, and always.

through the clouds……

I hope you don’t mind me writing you and updating you on Chris’ return home. I’m not sure I can cry any more tears and remain strong for my family too without talking with somebody. My head is in a spin and my heart aches as we start the process of bringing Chris home. Today Natalie, Caroline, Ryan and I were flown to Dover Air Force Base to witness the dignified transfer ceremony. It is the ceremony where our men and women in uniform take heroes and render honors as they return to American soil. I’ve had to do some difficult tasks in my life and Army career, but I have to say that standing there in the rain and cold and watching our military men and women take loving care of my son, like they have with the thousands who have preceded him was about too much to bear. It was too much for Caroline, she collapsed at seeing her beloved husband and Ryan’s daddy, in a flag draped transfer case, being unloaded from the plane and put into the van which has taken Chris to the mortuary unit to prepare him for his trip home.

I was moved by the reverence and care the honor guard, the general officer, the chaplains the mortuary staff, the security detail and even the military families on Dover Air Force Base gave to Chris and my family on the way to and from the flightline and during the transfer. I can’t imagine where these people find the strength to do this over and over again. They too, are truly heroes-military and civilian alike.

But I thought you should also know about the other heroes we ran into today, because they made my heart swell with love and pride, even as it was breaking. It started with the United check-in clerk who moved or bumped somebody out of premium seating to ensure that Natalie and I could sit together on the flight to Philadelphia. It continued with the flight attendant who leaned over and whispered some tender words to my wife as she sat crying on the plane, holding the picture or her “baby and his baby” (Chris and Ryan) that I shared with you.

Then came the cascade of wonderful gestures, messages and visitors who were ensuring that my kids, family and friends who could not go with us, were being comforted and feeling the love and reverence for Chris that we received today. Finally I have to say two final events happened which made my soul soar and my tears start anew.

First, Caroline told me, that a gentleman on her flight overhead her talking with her military escort about Chris’ death and he politely asked Caroline to speak with him at the arrival gate when she got off the plane. When she got off the plane, the gentleman was standing there and he said he owned a business and he always supported the troops and he wanted to help her out. He placed several folded bills in her hand and said “buy something nice for your baby.” Then he walked away without introducing himself. Caroline put the bills in her pocket and went to baggage claim.

Later today, Caroline was telling us about this kind gesture and she pulled out the folded bills. She said, “I think he gave me twenty dollars.” She was wrong. He had given her five hundred dollars. Natalie and I started crying for a stranger who’s only wish was to do something nice, without recognition or reward.

When I decided to share this story with you, that ‘s when the second event occurred. I read all of the comments under Chris’ picture and the outpouring of care, concern and reverence that the readers of KisP offered to us. I couldn’t stop crying. We are overwhelmed that so many people took the time to offer a part of their heart in an effort to save ours. You all are heroes to me and my family. And I guess this brings me to my main point. What a wonderful country this is, surrounded by people who offer their treasure, their service, acts of simple kindness and even their hearts to help a stranger in need. I am confident we will prevail against the evil that is plaguing humanity. Thank you for putting Chris’ sacrifice into perspective for me. I think I might even get through these dark times.

May the Almighty God bless and keep you and reward you in this life and the next.

Mike

Welcome to the Imperfect Perfectly Normal Mothers Club

2009-10-21T12:19:00.004-05:00

You know, as a mother you sometimes feel like you are juggling sooooo much and sometimes the ball drops and I have to remember that as long as we have our health, our tummies are full, our bodies are clothed properly, and we have a roof over our head, then I am doing a good job.

I dropped the ball on Monday by forgetting to send a snack with my son and I didn't realize it until Tuesday evening.....to which my son proceeded to tell me that it had made him cry! UGH! Visualize us scurrying to Wal-Mart for snacks immediately following his dance class.....ha! ha!

I mentioned this on my Facebook and was overjoyed with my fellow FB moms who proceeded to chime in with "if you think that's bad....this one time I......." and I felt completely normal. It brought me out of the dark hole that I had climbed into - protecting myself from the perfect mothers who take the time to bake allergen free cupcake from scratch with hidden vegetables in them and frosting from honey they processed themselves. I am NORMAL, not perfect.....normal!

And as I was getting this rush of advice and wondering if any of my fellow FB moms who weren't responding to me were thinking "that's terrible", "her poor child" or God forbid "I would never forget my childs snack day"......I received great life advice from one of my guilty pleasures....a reality show on MTV - The City.

In a response regarding backstabbing/back-biting/competition a jewelry designer advises someone to "stay refined, stay elegant and the others will fall to the wayside". *sound the heavenly angels please* And armed with that wonderful advice, I will stay refined, stay elegant and let the perfect mothers out there fall to the wayside. Because as someone said to me, if you got through your day and everyone was safe and healthy and the only thing that was dropped was snacks on snack day, then it was a good day.

Now.....hold your head up high normal mothers.....we should be proud of everything we do! In the past 12 hours my imperfect self sat with my children and ate my breakfast which put a little crunch on my morning routine of hair and make-up (you know, a ponytail and few brush strokes of blush, powder, or whatever is in the make-up bag) - so I had to do my make-up in the car on the way to work, last night I was in a rush and did NOT pick up fast food or food from the deli - I made my children a homemade meal with love (boiled noodles and sauce from a jar) and they loved it, and tonight my children may not get a shower because of our crunched schedule due to catechism class. But it's okay.....everyone will survive, life will stay on course, and I will always hold my head up high!

To vaccinate or not to vaccinate....that is the question!

2009-10-20T15:44:00.003-05:00

Wow....topic of the day today.....should I or shouldn't I get the vaccination for H1N1 or more importantly, should I vaccinate my child or children?

I don't want to open an argument or a debate about this....but I would like to say that as a parent, you know your family better than anyone else and you will ultimately decide what is best for your family. I don't think there is a wrong or right in the decision.....I think if you are presented with the facts and you make a well rounded decision then that's the very best thing you could do for yourself and your family.

People are really passionate about their decisions and I think that's great....but don't forget to not judge others if they've decided to do something different than you do.

I hope/pray that everyone stays healthy and that this passes quickly!

Our differences

2009-10-18T11:14:00.002-05:00

I had a great conversation with a dear friends mother last night. We were talking about how she invites students from the university into her home for meals and to give them a mother figure while they are studying so far from their home countries. She does this because she came here from another country and within her first few years here she suffered from terrible migraines and was in the hospital for weeks thinking she was going to die. Nobody came to visit her and she felt very alone....she considered moving back to her home country at that point, but ended up moving to a different state, met her husband, and the rest is history.

She feels as thought she is providing this wonderful service to students as a way of giving back and I think it's amazing. While we were talking I asked her out of the 30+ years of giving herself to others if anyone has ever taken advantage of her. She recalled one individual who would demand instead of ask, expect instead of wait for an offer, and someone who pressured her to sacrifice time with people who truly loved her so that she could provide services for this individual. And then she gave me an "ah ha" moment......

She said "Look at your fingers, see how they are on the same hand, but they are all different? They are all serving the same purpose, but they move differently and look differently, and they respond differently to things. That's how I look at people. We are all on this Earth serving the same purpose - but we are all different and we shouldn't expect people to all be the same, we should expect anything from anyone and should be as gracious and as kind as we can be. The people that walk around with expectations will have to answer to their selfishness one day and I know that when my time comes, I will have to answer for myself."

Ah ha! What a great lady and I'm so happy that I got a chance to listen to her talk about her experiences. She brought up forgiveness and how she forgave the individual who did her wrong because again, she had no control over what the person did to her and although it was wrong, this person would have a higher power to answer to one day. And I think that is so powerful, forgiveness is such a difficult thing to do.

I accept others and all of the differences that we bring to this Earth, I try not to judge or label others because I don't like to be labeled or judged myself, and I am working on how to forgive others - I think that is something we work on through our entire life because not every painful situation is the same and there is no blanket statement for forgiveness.

What a great end to a wonderful day.....there are opportunities for us to learn every day, sometimes we have to look for them, and sometimes you find them in the most unexpected places. Every day when you wake up you need to find the thing within your day that is going to make you a better person than you were yesterday. I am excited for the opportunities to learn yesterday and can't wait to see what today brings!

Celebrating 11 Years Of Marital Bliss

2009-10-16T09:28:00.002-05:00

On October 24th my husband and I will celebrate 11 years of marriage together....the traditional gift for this anniversary is steel and I have to believe that our marriage is made of steel in order to have made it to 11 years. When you look at the definition of steel and compare it with a marriage, it makes complete sense and it describes our marriage perfectly.

Why is a marriage compared to steel?

"Iron and steel are used widely in the construction of roads, railways, infrastructure, and buildings. Most large modern structures, such as stadiums and skyscrapers, bridges, and airports, are supported by a steel skeleton."

The comparison of a marriage to steel represents the solid foundation that two people should build their relationship on. Large structures are given a solid start by having at the very least a steel frame and marriages should to have a solid foundation in order to succeed.

"Two distinguishing factors are steel's increased rust-resistance and better weldability."

This made me smile when I read it in the definition of steel. What a great representation for a marriage - rust-proof and good weldability. I think that long term marriages have weathered so many storms together and when something metal sits out in too many storms it can easily rust....unless it is made of steel. And weldability makes me think of the bond that forms in a relationship throughout the years.

Can't a marriage weaken over time?

"There are many types of heat treating processes available to steel. The most common are annealing and quenching and tempering.

Annealing is the process of heating the steel to a sufficiently high temperature to soften it. This process occurs through three phases: recovery, recrystallization, and grain growth.

Quenching and tempering first involves heating the steel to the austenite phase, then quenching it in water or oil. This rapid cooling results in a hard and brittle martensitic structure.

The steel is then tempered, which is just a specialized type of annealing. In this application the annealing (tempering) process transforms some of the martensite into cementite or spheroidite to reduce internal stresses and defects, which ultimately results in a more ductile and fracture-resistant metal."

What a great look at how a marriage is tested over time! I think of a relationship heating up as result of an argument and how it can soften the relationship making it weak. Some arguments need a little recovery time, some arguments can be resolved quickly, some issues make your relationship stronger and some transform your relationship into something new.

So as we approach our 11th year of marriage I have to believe that our relationship is strong like steel - we have weathered so many storms together, we have practically grown up together and we have a bond that will never be broken, our love has transformed over the years and yes there have been moments when our relationship was weakened, but we came back stronger than before.

I thank God for having Randy in my life, I don't even want to imagine what my life would have been like had I ever given up, he is my best friend, he looks out for my best interests, he takes care of me, he is an amazing father, and he is the hardest working person that I know. He inspires me to be the best person I can be and I know, I will always know, that he stands by me 100%.

I have always said that two things that are key components to a good relationship are communication and trust.....he's a boy, so the communication part is always a work in progress, but I know that I can 100% trust him and that my friends is the thing about steel - when you have a foundation made out of steel, you know that you can trust it to withstand hundreds of years of storms.

Deals Deals Deals

2009-10-14T07:43:00.002-05:00

Today is a great day for deals! If you live in my area - apples are $0.88/lb. at Wal-Mart - including HONEYCRISP apples that are normally the price of gold! ha!

And online there are awesome deals on shoes at www.6pm.com - including Red Wing shoes for men!

Enjoy those deals today....I'm off to work to pay for my last order from www.6pm.com that arrived yesterday - 6 new pair of shoes for a little over $50 to which my husband asked "so are you going to get rid of 6 pair of shoes out of your closet?" - um, no honey, but nice try!

Have a frugal day my friends!

I'm sick

2009-10-13T12:41:00.003-05:00

I have bronchitis and pneumonia....what was said to be something "viral" a few weeks ago has developed into something that is threatening to put me in the hospital! EEK! I am loading up on liquids, homemade soup, and sleep.

See you all soon....it's time for my nap!

Super Saturday Savings

2009-10-10T23:07:00.002-05:00

I just wanted to share a GREAT website for great deals on shoes and clothes - www.6pm.com check back for daily deals that are outstanding!

I wanted a pair of suede boots with fur this year....yeah right, I wasn't going to pay $150 or more for them.....well, I didn't - there was a one day deal and I got those boots for $14.95! And I bought my husband a pair of Red Wing work shoes for $24.95.

There are shoes, clothes, and accessories for women, men, and children.

Go there often and get your bargain on!

Final Thought For The Week

2009-10-09T16:23:00.003-05:00

As we approach the weekend I was taking a look back at my week and realizing that the days go by so fast, lots of activities for the week, always on the go trying to do well at work and be there for my children at all of their functions, I just have to hope and pray that I'm being the best I can be in all aspects of my life. And with that, I am leaving this week with the following quote:

"Do all the good you can,

By all the means you can,

In all the ways you can,

In all the places you can,

At all the times you can,

To all the people you can,

As long as ever you can."

John Wesley

Have a great weekend and here's to the new possibilities that the next week brings to us!

What do you say ALOT?

2009-10-06T10:34:00.003-05:00

Okay, I realized today that I say two words ALL THE TIME......Crack and Awesome.

When something is crazy good - like my friend Briana's Buffalo Chicken Dip, Oreo Cake, or anything that she makes - it becomes "crack dip" or "crack cake". This morning I was straightening my hair and I said that my hair was on crack because it has grown SO much and when my oldest son asked me what that meant - I replied that it just meant that my hair was crazy. BUT on my way to work I wondered what a teacher or another adult would say if my son simply said "my mom is on crack"......UGH! I need to change that - I need to find another word for these things - preferably something I wouldn't mind coming out of my childs mouth!!

I say awesome all the time....my boss asks me to do something and my reply is never "okay" - it's always "awesome" with a sarcastic tone. There are things in life that are truly awesome....my friends baby girl Mia who is overcoming the hurdles of CDH - Mighty Mia is awesome and awe inspiring!

And apparently I roll my eyes all the time....and they are not stuck in that position mom!!! But that's just a silly habit that goes along with my sometimes sarcastic responses.....OOPS!

What do you say and/or do a lot that you sometimes think "EEK....I should really change that?!"

Oh yeah, that's right, I have Lupus?!

2009-10-04T10:20:00.003-05:00

In the warmer months of the year I forget that I have Lupus....I run and play as if I have no worries. Then the cold hits....my hands ache, my body aches, I get sores in my nose, and suddenly I feel like a 90 year old woman. UGH!

Lupus is not fun, it comes in all forms, mine come in the form of arthritis most of the time. When I am having a flare up, which I am having now, I feel like I have the flu and I get sores inside my nose....I know, gross right?! It stinks!

Another cause of flare ups is stress - um, as the mother of two young children my stress levels are already high - add in a little issue with one child, a challenging phase of another, a marriage on hold for hunting season, family drama, friend drama, busy time at work, a couple of college courses in an attempt to finish my degree, and this mama is stressed beyond stressed.

Life with Lupus is not fun, it's manageable, I have no complaints here because I watched a mother with two sons leaving my rheumatologists office and she was using a walker because Lupus affected her spine so bad that she couldn't walk without assistance. I was humbled....I can still walk, I can still go outside and play with my children, and I can still dance around as if I know what I'm doing. But that doesn't mean that my physical being isn't challenged.....today I am challenged, I worked at a football game yesterday and walked a lot in the cold. I used my hands a lot. And my immune system has been compromised because of a cold or flu that has been trying to attack me this week.

Today I am a single mommy because my husband is working and then would like to hunt this evening.....I am preparing a meal for his cousin and his cousins girlfriend who just had a little girl.....I am caring for my own children......and I have to practice hula for a performance this week. If I were a lady of leisure I could call in the nanny to care for the children, call in my cook to feed my children and Randy's cousins family, call in my housekeeper to finish my laundry, and call in my choreographer to learn the routine to teach me later - all so I could rest and focus on myself. But I live in the real world and today I will get through the day and when I can't go anymore I will go just a little more......tomorrow I will wake up and wonder why I am exhausted still and remind myself 'Oh yeah, that's right, I have Lupus".....grrr......ha! ha!

I've Been Robbed

2009-10-02T13:54:00.003-05:00

Borrowed From WBGL Tim and Pam In The Morning Show......it describes what I'm feeling right now.

I've Been Robbed

I was robbed during the morning show today.

I was happily minding my own business when, within a matter of seconds, it was gone. It wasn't my wallet - though there's not much money in it anyway. It wasn't my car - though my 2004 Subaru isn't exactly "theft" material. It wasn't even my identity - that was stolen last year.It was my joy. An online conversation with a frustrated listener grabbed it and took off down the street. As you might imagine, it left me in a rather rotten mood. Okay, a very rotten mood.

This listener (a pastor, of all people) was mad that he hadn't received a response to a recent email that he had sent to me, and quickly began threatening to switch his allegiances to another radio station (and speak poorly of me to others) if I didn't get back with him in a timely manner.This instant message exchange took less than five minutes, but it has left a long-lasting impression. As an employee who takes pride in my work ethic, the implication that I wasn't doing my job very well cut deep.

Between Facebook, Twitter, and email...our show receives literally hundreds of messages every week. Many radio personalities respond to very few (if any) of their messages, and (though I'm not perfect) I try very hard to do exactly the opposite.But, this isn't really about email or Facebook or even a frustrated listener. It's about me and my willingness to let someone else's actions effect my entire day.

You may have heard this phrase before: "You can't control what others say or do to you, you can only control how you react to it." It's true. But, let's be honest...that's much easier said than done, right? I certainly don't have it all figured out yet. In fact, five hours later, I'm STILL trying to get my joy back. I have a beautiful wife, two amazing boys, a job that I love, and a free weekend in front of me...and (because of a stupid disagreement) my joy is still hard to find today.

Been there?If so, maybe you can work through this with me: my identity, my worth, and my value are NOT found in other people's opinions or actions. Technically, they're not found in my wife, kids, job, or lack of weekend activities either. God alone gives me my value. The rest is trivial.

Today, I've had it backward.

Thankfully, tomorrow, I have a chance to get it right. At least I don't have any plans.

Little Charlie

2009-10-01T22:47:00.005-05:00

Our family has been blessed with a new addition....Charlie the Yorkie came into our family recently and has adjusted to the madness quite well!

We were of course heartbroken to lose our Millie earlier this year and while we love our lab, Lucy, we really wanted to add one more to our tribe because we are just one of those "two dog" families I think.

Charlie is 7 months old and has been a joy - he's playful, easy for the boys to help take care of, he loves to snuggle, and one of the greatest things....he is not a yapper! We thought because of the breed, he might be - but he's not. In the first 48 hours of having him we didn't hear a peep out of him!

I know that the responsibility of taking care of our dogs falls mainly on my shoulders - but I don't mind this 9 lb. sweet face. He is enjoyable, sweet, and we feel truly blessed with him!

ADHDOS

2009-09-30T14:43:00.003-05:00

I just had to share a funny story.....in looking back at my past posts, I've been a little preachy - I'm going through a lot and this is my outlet

So I was talking to my brother Denis about Logan and his diagnoses of ADHD and Denis had a lot of insight due to the fact that his two sons have gone through similar disorders. And as he was talking he mentioned that he himself had ADHDOS, when I asked him what that was he said "Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Dis...OH SHINY" - ha! ha! This is so me - I walk into a room and have no idea what my intentions are in that room. I open a cabinet and have no idea what I wanted out of there.

I am self diagnosing myself with ADHDOS and I know that there are others out there that can relate to me.....let's form a support group and meet once a month for margaritas and dancing! ha! ha!

How do you feel about your judgement day?

2009-09-29T09:07:00.004-05:00

In a lifelong journey of growth spiritually I asked myself this morning "How do you feel about your judgement day?" and surprisingly I feel good about it. I know that I have not been a perfect person in God's eyes, however, I feel as though the good I have done has been with the best of intentions, never selfish, and always with the love in my heart.

On Sunday I went to church, to my Catholic church, the one that I feel as though I struggle with....it became clear to me that the only struggle I am having with my church is that I don't make an effort to go and maybe I am just making excuses about why I don't go. When I do go the message speaks to me, as it did on Sunday, and I leave there with a clear mind and a purpose to think about throughout my week.

This Sunday was about following through with God in all aspects, not just praying on your own, saying grace at the dinner table, but attending church and living your life by following God's plan. Message received loud and clear and while I will not be a person that goes overboard with my beliefs and my religion, know that I am actively following God's plan for me. I know what my purpose is, I know what my life plan is, and I am on that journey because I fully intend to get to heaven.

Another message that was so obviously meant for me was dealing with friendships and about being a friend because you truly want to and not because you have selfish motives behind it. This is something that I have so clearly been dealing with lately and I left church with the answers that I have been seeking on this very issue. I know that when my judgement day comes, it will never be a question of if I have been a true friend or not, because I am. I give myself fully to others and never have a selfish intention behind it. I never expect to get anything from others that I am a friend to. My only intentions as a friend is to bring joy, help heal, and to lend a hand.....never to get anything in return. And those are the only kinds of friends that I want in my life.....friends that are kind to me without expectations or thoughts of "what am I going to get out of this".

How do you feel about your judgement day? Is the path that you are on one you are living with a whole heart? Are you following God's plan for you? How do you feel about yourself as a wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend? What areas do you need to work on in your life? You know there is a saying that I like "You are not a Christian just because you sit in church on Sunday; If you sit in a garage does that make you a car?" - do you follow what you claim to believe? Do you live your life with a purpose that promotes goodness?

I have witnessed so much negativity in relationships lately, so much hypocrisy, and so much selfishness......I just want to say to those people in my life "why do you walk around asking what you are getting out of life, when you should be walking around asking what you are giving to the world around you." I feel good about my judgement day, I know I'm certainly not perfect, but I'm being the best person that I know how to be and isn't that part of the plan?

Sometimes your world has to stop spinning just a little....

2009-09-23T15:23:00.003-05:00

When our first child was born I thought that I had everything planned out.....he thought differently. He has definitely shown me that there is no textbook definition on how to raise a child - he challenges me, he educates me, and he is overall a really great kid. I write this with a heavy heart because my son is broken, he is broken and I don't know how to fix it. I don't know how it happened and I blame myself anyway.....isn't that just what mom's do?

I want to say that he's been a difficult child for some time, but that feels too harsh - he's been very challenging. And this year, especially right off the bat with school, he seemed to struggle with a lot of anger and anxiety that honestly I didn't know how to handle. I did what I could to get him to a counselor who just yesterday diagnosed him with ADHD, an anxiety disorder, and a bit of an oppositional disorder. She described him perfectly - he is not a trouble maker in the traditional sense - he likes things to go a specific way and when something changes or doesn't go the way he thinks it should he can't handle it. He can't handle change, he can't handle disappointment, and he can't handle doing things differently or imperfect.

In school he can't sit in his seat, he shouts out answers, he goes to the window during a spelling test and points out birds, and his teacher, God love her, has been amazing!

Yesterday it was suggested that we try medication and counseling as a way to get him through this.....now I know it's controversial and I have been opposed to medications for the treatment of ADHD, so I won't say what our decisions have been to help Logan, but we chose the best option for our son and our family and we are going to handle this the best we know how. As a wife and mother, you want to take care of your family the very best you can and I feel like I do the best I can every day - when someone you love so much is hurting, your world has to stop spinning just a little so you can hold them a little longer, say all of the things you need to say a little more, and take every extra second you can get with them. When my child is broken, so am I and I'm just doing the best I can to fix his "boo boos" while I still have the chance.

There is a saying that I've always loved about parenting "the fingerprints on the wall get higher and higher and then they disappear" and you just have to love them while you can and hope that you are doing your very best in the time that you have them.

Struggling with faith

2009-09-20T20:21:00.005-05:00

Some things have happened recently that have me questioning faith. Recently I have been facing things that I feel like I could find the answers to in church. But I don't feel a connection to my church - I was raised Catholic and still attend (I use that term lightly) the church I have grown up in, but oddly enough I don't feel a connection because it's such a strict religion and frankly haven't followed the rules and am doing okay - so I feel like a bit of an outcast in a sense.

Not only am I struggling with that, but if I were to break away from my church and begin researching or even attending a new church, how would I tell my parents. My family have been strong Catholics for generation and I almost feel like I am a bigger disappointment if I decide to be Christian or Methodist vs. not going to church at all. However, our family has faced major disappointments and I almost feel like if I were to change churches that would be a fairly mild thing to do.

I pray, I have faith, I believe, but I'm just struggling with the fact that the religion that I know to turn to doesn't support me in what I believe in. I want to give my children a good foundation in faith, and have sent them to religion classes every Wednesday night since they were eligible, but they are being forced to go just like I was.....but I have been less strict about attending church every Sunday. I feel like I am praying so much about this and all the while I am needing direction.

I need direction in how to be a good wife, parent, daughter, sister, and friend. In my life right now I am struggling with all of those things. My husband and I are dealing with the stresses of parenting a child that has major anxiety issues, my family is dealing with the deceit and lies that are the result of an extra marital affair, and within my group of friends we are dealing with a change in personalities that is threatening our relationships. I feel like I need to turn to someone who can guide me through this. The other weekend I found myself saying "who is taking care of me?" - and I know who is taking care of me....I just don't know where I fit in to worship him.

So I am struggling with my faith and I think it shouldn't be something that is stressful, but feel like I am going against generations of Catholics here and have to think that they would all support me in this knowing that I am seeking out direction and am turning to my faith for that.

Okay, so my plan and my bodies plan don't exactly match up.....

2009-07-14T11:33:00.005-05:00

I set into motion my goal for losing weight, getting in shape, and fitting into an AMAZING dress. I put it out the into the Universe my goals, had a plan, and my body said "Wait, no, uh uh, this is what we are going to do instead.......chest pains!"

On Sunday, June 27th, I blacked out; on Wednesday, July 1st, I ended up in the ER with chest pains; and since then it's been about the same. I go tomorrow for a stress test on the treadmill because they believe that I have developed a heart arrhythmia. What is that you say? Well, it's an irregular heartbeat so to speak. What does that mean for me? I don't know yet, and I won't know until the test results come back.

Given that I have Lupus, there are so many other things that this could be because Lupus can attack major organs and the concern is that maybe this is a condition resulting from the Lupus.....until tomorrow we don't know for sure what is going on.

I do know that I am extremely tired all the time, have difficulty doing any physical activity at all without having to stop because I'm out of breath, I continue to have chest pains & numbness down my left arm and my intended plans have been halted until I know further what I need to do to make myself better. I am however, continuing my plan to watch what I eat, because after all, I apparently have some kind of heart condition and I want to make sure more than anything that I do everything I can to remain healthy.

My concern now is not weight loss, exercise or fitting into my dress....it's simply to be healthy, take good care of myself, and make sure I am around for my children for a very long time. This is all happening too soon after I read an article about an increase in deaths for individuals who have Lupus.....so that weighs heavy on my mind given that I never was scared following the diagnoses, I always tend to have a "Whatever it is, I will handle it and everything will be fine" attitude. Sometimes you have to realize that your life plan doesn't always match up with God's plan and I'm trying to work that out with him.....ha! ha!

I am taking one day at a time, looking forward to the test tomorrow and the results it will bring so that I know what direction I am going, loving my family and friends, and making the best out of every moment. Hope you are doing well in your goals and know that I am always cheering for you!

Can someone motivate me....PLEASE!!!

2009-06-26T09:48:00.006-05:00

Okay, I am going to be honest here, I hate my body these days. I feel flabby, blobby, and just overall fat!!! I am within my healthy weight range....the higher end of it, but I just feel like I need to TONE TONE TONE!!! I do exercise, not religiously, but I am active and I do eat well - I just am not where I would like to be.

In 2006 I went on a diet plan and lost over 50 lbs. and have since gained about 20 lbs. of that back. Looking back I wonder how I motivated myself to stick to that plan.....I'm sure it had something to do with paying up front for the program and having accountability to meet with a counselor once or twice a week?! But I need to find that motivation again, that drive to want to lose a little weight and stick to a regular exercise routine.

One factor that I'm looking at is my 15 year class reunion is approaching, it's 57 days away to be exact. I am 19 lbs. away from my goal weight.....so in order to fit into this amazingly gorgeous dress that I inherited (black/white, very fitted, sparkly.....awesome) - I have to lose approximately 0.3 lbs. a day and I am going to have to tone my problem areas ALOT. So I'm hoping that will give me a push to do this.....to really buckle down again and dedicate myself to being healthy and get tone.

Another thing that I am going to do is to blog about this journey every day and hope that my accountability will come from my audience. Kick me in the butt if you need to - I need it!!

So....I am going to reveal to you my numbers - this is always scary! EEK! I weigh to date - 184 lbs. a weight that I have been hovering around for awhile! During the holidays I was up about 12 lbs. from that, so I did lose that at least, which is awesome.....but I have 19 more to go!! I am 6 ft. tall and my healthy weight range is 147 lbs. - 184 lbs. - so as I said, I am at the high end! ; ) Losing 19 lbs. will put me right in the middle at 165 lbs. - and I feel most comfortable in my own skin at between 165 lbs. - 170 lbs.

So those are my numbers.....and how am I going to get to my goal......here is my plan!

1. Eat right - obviously - I will be entering my food intake at http://www.sparkpeople.com/ - it's a free website that tracks everything and helps you see the areas that are excessive, or maybe where you need to eat more.

2. Exercise more - I am going to make it a point to get up early every morning and tackle a workout. I have TurboJam, Slim In 6, Zumba, Wii Fit right at my fingertips and I have a black lab that loves to go for runs/walks.....there is NO REASON that I can't get up at 5:00 a.m. every morning and do something.

3. Sleep more - this my friends is a struggle for me......I have become quite a night owl and it's simply that I am up cleaning/picking up the house/catching up on ridiculous television and I have to stop doing this.....my bedtime lately has been past midnight - not good! I am going to set my bedtime at between 8:30 p.m./9:00 p.m. from here on out - if I am going to get up at 5:00 a.m., this is a MUST!

Three things that are essential to get me to my goal of "the dress".....and in addition to that - the best shape of my life. It's all in front of me and there will be obstacles (a huge town party tomorrow is one of them.....so I will give myself that day, 4th of July, and Logan's birthday) - but I have to be realistic about it and just envision myself in the dress with toned arms, abs, booty and I will get there.

I hope that you are always setting goals for yourself and pushing yourself to find ways to change yourself for the better!

Lots of love - Angela

Just checking in!

2009-06-15T08:56:00.005-05:00

Wow, it's been since April since I last posted - holy cow! A lot has happened in the past month and a half and I guess I just haven't taken the time to write......or I simply haven't had time to write! Here are some mini blogs for you......

Are you a good citizen? - You know I love my little town and feel protective of it because it's where I've grown up, it's a place that I want my children to feel safe in, and I think enough of my town to want it to stay as quiet and neighborly as possible. With that being said, there was an incident on Sunday that shook me to my core and I hope that my actions were right. While on my walk I ventured into the neighborhood that I grew up in and while walking by a small house I heard voices, loud voices, and then little voices. The loud voices were screaming things that shook me up and scared me.....abusive, hateful, and vicious.

I continued to walk, thinking about what I could do, trying not to be naive in thinking that as a parent I haven't lost it a time or two. However, on my way back the voices had gotten louder and even more violent, enough that I jumped and prepared myself for something terrible. What could I do without interfering? There were small voices with fear in them and I felt as though I had to protect them. Luckily the police station was close by and I walked in and relayed my story to them and they were going to check it out. I went home and hugged my babies. Now I wait and I worry that everyone involved is okay and that my decisions were right.

Are you a good friend? - My friendships are super important to me, they always have been. I make sure to check in with my friends to see if they need anything, and am always willing to drop what I am doing to help anyone out. That has always been my style and even more so now that most of my friends are busy wives and mothers themselves.....we could all use an extra set of hands every now and then.

There are friendships that I had been concerned about in recent months, feeling a little used maybe, or maybe it was just disappointment, or maybe it was concern. I don't know what I was feeling, but I wasn't feeling great about the friendship and questioned myself "If you are being a good friend to someone and they aren't a good friend back, why do you continue being loyal to them?" - and before I could answer - it happened. A moment we have all been faced with, something we thought was so important that we risked everything for, my dear friend judged me and was disrespectful to me because I wasn't doing something that they thought I should do.

I was and still am hurt, confused, and heartbroken because of their actions and I am mourning a loss of a friendship that will never be the same. Is it over? Yes. Have I accepted their apology? Yes. Am I done talking about it? Absolutely. Are we ever going to be the same? No.

I thought about this on my walk yesterday, shortly before the other incident (my walk was really insightful and interesting yesterday!), and this is what I came up with. There are things that happen in your life that change you, and my hope is that the moment the change happens, I am a better person than I was the moment before the change occurred. I hope that the decisions I make in life always make me a better person and I hope that I am able to take a negative and make it positive in every situation. The situation with my friend has made me really look at our friendship and to see how much value I put into our relationship and to rethink that a little. Is change always good? Nope, but it shifts the direction you are going and gives you a fresh perspective on things and that's what I have, a fresh perspective on my friendships.

Are you a good spouse? - I love my husband, I really do. I have been with him as a partner since I was 16 going on 17.....Sound of Music fans, I know you just sang that, like I did!....we have been friends since I was 14. Does that mean that our marriage is perfect, not by any means - we fight over who did the dishes last, who wrote a check and didn't put it in the checkbook, etc. But we respect one another and love one another enough to know that in the scheme of things - none of the petty stuff matters and when it comes down to it we are a good team and we value one another immensely.

When you have kids, your marriage seems to get placed on the back burner, and dates with your spouse soon become a group cookout with friends where you are chasing the kids around, a trip through a drive-through fast food joint and the latest children's movie, or sitting in the ER waiting room with a child who is vomiting and running a temp. So when you schedule a date with your husband, you suddenly feel your heart flutter with excitement, you look forward to the moment you are in the car with him and know that you won't be refereeing fights from the back of the car, you dream of the menu that doesn't come with crayons and a cool keepsake cup, and you dress up in the outfit that is pushed to the waaaaaay back of your closet behind the sweat pants and zip up hoodies.

Aahh......my sweet husband recently planned a date and we enjoyed both dinner and a movie and we did not, I repeat, we DID NOT stop by the grocery store to pick anything up on the way home. We watched a hilarious R-rated movie and we ate a great meal where we quietly talked about life. I can't wait for our next date, maybe I will plan one soon and surprise him. Until then, I look back and think of what a great time I had and how it was nice for those few hours to just be man and wife and not dad and mom.

Are you a good student? - Just because you are no longer in school, doesn't mean that you should stop learning. With that said, I'm back in school.....ha! I have taken awhile to complete my Bachelor's degree and with the encouragement of my husband and my boss - I am taking classes again so that I can do that. I know that 6 semester hours doesn't seem like much, but it is.....and I have added it to my plate along with everything else and I am trying to find the balance. I am doing my very best and I hope that when I walk across the stage to get my degree, I will show my children that you need to value yourself enough to set goals and follow them through no matter how long it takes.

This my friends is all for today - I hope that you are having a great summer and that I will check in more often.

You know it's been awhile, but I'm glad ya' came.....

2009-04-28T11:48:00.008-05:00

I have taken a break from blogging due to complete chaos in our lives....remodeling! My husband and I take our tax return and put it into home improvement projects and this year those projects were mainly indoors - new paint, new flooring, new tile, etc., etc., many changes in our home and I am a very lucky girl because my husband knows how to or at least figures out how to do it all himself.

In addition to the busy lives we lead I have found myself with not a lot to say lately - I am blessed with an amazing family, a beautiful marriage, great children, and friends that are more dear to me than life itself. However, there's a situation I find myself in that hasn't been easy and it's been a tough choice for me and so that has quieted me a little. Fortunately the spring is giving me the feeling of new life and with the choices I've made I feel like a new life is awaiting me and it's refreshing!

Now, I am sure that your interest is peaked, so what is this choice I've made? Well, I decided to remove toxic people from my life and while it can sometimes be as simple as hitting the delete button on your friends list on Facebook, other times it's family members and that's not as simple. After years of being the brunt of negative comments and ridicule from one particular person, I decided that it was time to cut the cord.....I wanted so badly to form a bond with this person and it simply never happened and even though I gave up - I know that I made great efforts to have a relationship without any reciprocation, so I don't consider that failure on my part, I consider that her great loss.

My husband has been caused great pain by this decision, and it's not pain inflicted by me.....it's coming from the other side. And it makes me sad for him - he is an amazing person that deserves all of the happiness and love in the world and I am really blessed that he came into my life when he did. He has saved me from myself so many times and I am the person I am today because of him. And I feel like I have shown him what true love is and that love is shown in your words and your actions. We are certainly not a perfect couple and as recently as Saturday night had an argument and talked things out and worked through it like two adults - that's what marriage is about - it's not being negative, spouting cruel comments at each other, and holding grudges.

I think it's unfortunate the situation we are in and fear that it will be too late for the other party involved to really know what it's like to have my husband and I on their side - we are good people, we are willing to help anyone in need without questions or expectations, we are hard workers and we are fully self-sustained and don't depend on others to contribute to our lives so that we can survive. Maybe because we are pretty much drama free we seem boring.....but we are far from that. Some people thrive on drama.....but our lives are so stressful as it is - we try to avoid drama at all costs. The only drama in our lives is inflicted by others and if they don't know this by now, we don't care - we may have cared about it at one time, but we really don't care about it now. Life is too short.

So while I've been quiet, there has been a lot going on.....both home remodeling and life-remodeling! ha! My heart is full and my life is good - what more could a girl ask for? Well, maybe some new shoes? ha! ha!

Enough Already!

2009-04-01T10:13:00.005-05:00

Oh my goodness....I've been such an emotional mess lately and it's time to put my "big girl pants" on and turn this mess around! We had to put our dog down, I have been dealing with a Lupus flare up due to the stress of that, my immune system is out of whack and I keep getting sick, I have ruled out running the race due to all of these health issues, dealing with some family issues, the boys' behavior has been challenging, dealing with a very cruel person that took something out on me that wasn't necessary, we are in the midst of home improvements that continue to leave our home in a cloud of dust and mess, and it snowed a little yesterday.

Today I am changing my focus on the negative and turning to the positive. Life is good, life is great - I have a wonderful husband, two healthy boys, my family is absolutely amazing, my friendships are stronger and more wonderful than I have ever known, and I have a job that I LOVE LOVE LOVE. All of the stress of everyday life is nothing compared to what you feel when you have other factors coming in - toxic people, toxic situations, and toxic attitudes - well, I am going to get rid of the those toxic things and move on.

I hope that the Spring is presenting you with new opportunities and the ability to shed things that are weighing you down.

Favorites For Your Frugal Friday

2009-03-27T11:32:00.004-05:00

I'm a frugal girl.....well, I try to be - it's exhausting sometimes to coupon, compare ads, think what sizes the boys might wear next season as I'm standing in the middle of the clearance clothing racks, try to remember the homemade recipe for "Bisquick" mix, but in the end - it's worth it, I do see a difference in our savings and I like that I don't have to make as many quick trips to the store for some things, I can just make them at home (cleaner, laundry detergent, baking mixes, etc.).

I do have inspiration in the form of blogs - women who write tips, sales they have found, deals/bargains, and everything frugal you could possible think of! And I thought I would share with you some of my favorite blogs on this Friday so that you can peruse through them and find some inspiration of your own.

Have a great weekend!

http://grocerycartchallenge.blogspot.com/

http://www.consumerqueen.com/

http://www.5dollardinners.com/

http://frugalfinds.blogspot.com/

http://qponqueen.blogspot.com/

http://crockpot365.blogspot.com/

http://bargainbriana.com/

Since we last talked......

2009-03-25T15:19:00.004-05:00

I have been struggling - as a mother, as a woman, as a person......but not struggling to eat chocolate - so no need for alarm! ha! I think we all struggle in our lives at some point and the past week has handed me a few challenges.

As a mother.....specifically, as a mother to boys - I am struggling with aggression, lying, and doing things to intentionally hurt another feelings. I must say as a child, I had a wild imagination, and tended to lie a bit in order to make my life seem more exciting.....so I have talked to my children about some of the times when I got caught lying and how the act of lying hurts everyone. Of course we have gone over the story of the little boy who cried wolf several times!

The aggression, well, that's our fault for not paying more attention to what video games the children were watching and maybe not paying close enough attention to the things they watch on television. We fell into the trap of wanting to give our boys everything in the world to make them happy, and now we are not taking that away, we are replacing the war/wrestling video games with family board games and television has really fallen silent in our house as we have been spending more time outside and playing imaginative things as a family.

And respecting others.....well, we are working on that, and I am trying to make the boys more sensitive to others feelings. This seems to be helping and I have had less fights to referee in the past week.....less fights is the key word here. I think there will always be fights because they are siblings!

As a woman I am struggling with the reveal of summer clothing.....can I get an "Amen" on that one. Here is a note that I typed to a dear friend of mine who is struggling with baby weight - and I typed it for myself as well.......I hope it helps you today.

"With the warmer weather coming, I lugged the big container of summer clothes out of the attic and pulled on some of my shorts from last year PRAYING that they would fit....not because they are my dream size, but because I didn't want to have to go out and buy bigger. (We all know the defeated feeling when you have to go to the clothing store and buy a bigger size.) Everything fit okay, however, showing more skin just makes me even more self conscious.....my jeans hold my fat in, my shorts do not! ; )

When I reached the bottom of the bin, there they were, my swim suits.......and in my head I heard the "ree, ree, ree, ree" sound from the movie Psycho. AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Before children I would have let this really get to me and would have turned to extremely unhealthy ways to lose weight. However, now that I have kids I have a responsibility to show them that nutrition and exercise are the only way that you can be healthy and the focus should not be on skinny. This is the gift of motherhood - a "do as I say, not as I do" type attitude when it comes to life. I have always been the bigger girl - standing at 6 foot tall when I was 15 was tough! In my 30's I am proud of my height and some days my weight! And I have to feel lucky that every day I wake up and can get out of bed and care for my children. With my lupus I have joint pain in my hands, my lower back, and my hips - so I have to sometimes find alternatives for exercise - but the point is that I have to exercise. And focusing on nutrition isn't always easy because there are so many temptations out there......that's when the focus needs to be moderation and not deprivation. It's okay to eat one or two cookies.......it's not okay to eat the whole box.

We are all beautiful women, and just like our homes - we are all built differently. But our strengths, our beliefs, our goals in life.....are very much the same - and we definitely compliment one another in personalities. I don't look at you for the sizes you are or are not for that matter, I definitely don't judge you for sitting on the couch watching Oprah and eating a box of chocolates, and I don't disapprove when you decide that you aren't going to exercise today. I support you all in every aspect of your lives and am here for you regardless of the need......and I know that you all would return the favor.

We all have goals and it might help to express them to one another and if we can just check in and see how one another is doing, that might help. My goal is to lose 10 pounds by May 30th. Seems easy right? I've been struggling with these same 10 lbs. for about a year and a half now.......grrr! Once I get to that point I will re-evaluate and see if I feel like I need to lose more - I feel like maybe a total of 15 lbs. would be good, but I want to start with 10!

I hope you all have a great day and know that I love you and support you 100%!"

As a person......well, I have been challenged this week a person that has lashed out at me due to a situation in their life. Many things they have said have been personal attacks directed at me and I am trying let it all slide because I know this person is upset. I do have a kind heart and have prayed that the reasoning for the situation presents itself soon so that maybe life returns to normal again. I am also praying that I can maintain my patience, I know that I am certainly not the reason the person is in the situation they are in and that I don't deserve their ugly words.

The Frugal Family

2009-03-17T12:38:00.002-05:00

We are in the middle of home renovations and children growing.....so needless to say money has been flying out of our pockets lately as we redo floors/walls/baths and to clothe our children (well, child - the oldest has been spoiled with many new things lately and the youngest will received them one day as if they were new!).

So on Sunday, in an effort to spend some quality family time together and yet remain super frugal.....we went to the free movie offered at our local movie theater AND I packed a bag of snacks for everyone - something I've not really done before - I even packed popped popcorn! ha! We did get lunch at a local fast food place where all 4 of us chose items from the Dollar Menu and spent around $10.00. And for dinner I cooked a ham, made pasta salad, and had strawberries to use up - so I made strawberry shortcake.

Please note my frugalness at dinner....our ham was $0.89/lb. - and I bought an 8 lb. ham - BARGAIN! And when it came to the pasta salad, my dh said he wanted italian dressing for the dressing part.....I panicked - did I have it? - well, I had a little of it and added oil, vinegar, and spices to make up the rest. And when I was deciding on the dessert portion, I ALMOST ran to the store for those spongy little shortcakes and some cool whip......my frugal little angel said to me "Angela dear, you can make shortcakes and whipped topping....you have everything here". So I turned to my trusty Betty Crocker and found an easy shortcake recipe and ATTEMPTED to make whipped topping out of skim milk.....it didn't work, but I didn't panic, I quickly dumped in some vanilla pudding I had on hand and decided that would be our topping.

So - while we did spend $10 for fast food and of course the groceries cost me (not much, but some!) - I was proud of myself for not running to the store italian dressing, shortcakes, and cool whip.

After dinner and clean-up, I made laundry detergent and both of the boys were really interested in helping and we talked about little expenses and how it only cost me about $0.01 per load with this detergent and how other laundry detergents were not alot more expensive per load, but enough to make a significant difference through the year, etc. So I was able to talk about making changes to how we spend money and let them help with the making of the detergent and hopefully I taught them valuable lessons for the future!

Whew.....being frugal is fun, but tiring!

Another frugal note - we road our bikes to the library last night to return movies we borrowed over the weekend, and I let each boy pick out one movie and one book each (it's a school week - so we might not have time to watch the movies) and I borrowed a book as I've decided to begin reading and watch less t.v. - I spent $0 yesterday and did a lot!

Happy Monday Morning!

2009-03-16T11:29:00.004-05:00

This morning I did the following:

had a child pee on my toilet paper roll holder (note to my sister: this is why I didn't have a toilet paper roll holder near my toilet, but I appreciate the Christmas present.)
had to take a shower in a shower that has been torn up due to repairs
referee two arguments about Star Wars
hit my elbow twice and it wasn't funny

HAPPY MONDAY!

Free Coupons For YOU!

2009-03-13T10:21:00.003-05:00

I have several coupons that I'm not going to use and don't want to see go to waste. Please send me a message or leave me a post if you are interested in any of these and I will mail them to you or send you the code if they are valid online! Enjoy!

Victoria's Secret - $10 off $50 Purchase (expires 3/25/09)
Victoria's Secret - Free Lip Gloss with any in store purchase (expires 4/1/09)
Gymboree (in-store or online) - 20% off entire purchase (expires 4/12/09)
Express (in-store or online) - $30 off your $90 purchase (expires 3/17/09)
Express (in-store or online) - 25% off your $75 purchase (valid 3/18/09 - 3/29/09)
Gap, Gap Outlet, Banana Republic, Banana Republic Factory Store, Old Navy - 30% off this weekend only (I will e-mail you the coupon!)

Happy Shopping!

Just one of those days.....

2009-03-10T10:44:00.002-05:00

You know, as a mother I allow myself all of, oh, 10 minutes to get ready in the morning. This morning it was 5 minutes because I put the makings for potato soup in the crock pot (I prepped everything the night before...kudos to planning ahead), made myself a good breakfast, did a load of laundry, picked up both boys rooms, picked up Lucy's dog toys, started the boys lunches, snuggled with Noah and pointed out that the birds were chirping outside of his window, talked to Logan about his plans for the day, made my lunch......looked at the clock and raced back to my room to find clothes that were clean, not wrinkled and that matched, hurried up and blew my hair dry, threw some make-up on my face, brushed my teeth, hurried the boys to get their coats on, grab an umbrella as I raced out the door (a Buzz Lightyear one!), ran back into the house to grab a box of cereal because I forgot to put a little baggie of cereal in my lunch (yes, I eat cereal for lunch.....in the winter I eat oatmeal - it's my thing!), and I broke up a fight between the boys about where they were going to sit in the car.

The boys reached school safely and I made it to work on time......where it's calm and quiet! Whew!

My dream.....every mom's dream!

2009-03-09T10:52:00.002-05:00

I don't always remember my dreams, there are nights that I don't know if I even had dreams - moms, I'm sure you can all relate! However, last night I had a good one and I REMEMBERED IT! Let me share it with you.......

A limo pulled up to my driveway and the driver (who just so happens to be the security guard in my building) announced that I had won a three day all-inclusive trip for two to the Bahamas and I had 5 minutes to pack my bags. I was home alone with the kids and was frantically running around packing my bags and I was so upset because I hadn't brought my summer clothes down from the attic yet, so I was making due with what I had in my closet and drawers. I was trying to call my sister so she could go with me (note...in reality I had worked all weekend on a home improvement project with my husband, so even in my dreams, he was the last person that I wanted to take on the trip with me! ha! ha!). And I was trying to make babysitting arrangements for my kids until my husband got home. Gary, the limo driver (real life security guard) was counting down the minutes until the limo left......I was just about out of the door when I was awaken by the alarm. DARN IT!

I love my family, they are my life, however, the very thought of having three days of bliss on a beach somewhere by myself or with my sister was awesome! Ahh.....now, back to my dreary Monday where there are schedules to keep, meals to plan, kids to transport, lunches to pack, bills to pay.......reality!

Hope you have a great week!

Angela

Weekend Warrior Project

2009-03-06T10:55:00.002-06:00

It started last night with what sounded like a jack hammer on the floor in our entryway.....the slate floor that has been cracking for a few years now is coming up and a beautiful ceramic tile floor is going to be laid in its place. YIPPEE!

The paint in entryway and our living room will now be a rich Applesauce Cake vs. the faded yellow that survived a short home daycare stint - red crayon on yellow walls - OH MY!

I couldn't be happier about this - I have patiently waited as new windows were installed, new gutters put up, a new air conditioner, a new air blowing unit in the attic, deck torn out and new patio poured......a lot of outdoor projects have come and gone while I picked out my paint colors, wrote down what needed to be done first inside, and prayed that Randy would finally listen to my plea of "please look into putting new tile in our bathtub"!

I have strategically placed rugs to cover cracks and/or stains on the floor, I even strategically place shampoo bottles to cover ickiness in our bathtub tile......and now I am going to get new tile in my entry way, kitchen/dining area, and bathtub, our old kitchen wallpaper is going to come down and new paint will go up, I will update our cabinets with new handles to freshen them up a bit, and I am going to repaint a few other rooms to freshen them up. We take our tax refund do everything we possibly can with it - and thankfully I am blessed with a handy husband who has saved us thousands of dollars by doing everything himself.

This weekend kicks off our first project and I am thrilled - I am not a huge fan of painting.....but I am a huge fan of FINALLY putting up all of the new shelving that I've had set aside for over a year and is going to keep us super organized right?!, the beautiful metal tree thing that I got from Pottery Barn, the gorgeous sleek black console table that is still in the box, and the candle holders that are still securely in their boxes ready for display!

What projects do you have going on this weekend?

Coupon Confusion

2009-03-05T09:19:00.003-06:00

I'm getting the hang of this coupon thing.....however, the young cashier at our local grocery store is not.

Last night a trip to our local store for milk, eggs, juice, and a bag of chips that I estimated as costing about $9.00 with my coupons nearly cost me $22.29. When I protested and made the young man void the transaction and go through the groceries again, the total was $7.28.

IGA
Gallon Skim Milk (2) $2.00 w/ coupon (I just now realized he only charged me for 1!!)
Juicy Juice (2) $1.50 w/ coupon (again, he only charged me for 1???)
Doritos $1.89 w/ coupon
Dozen Large Eggs $0.99 w/ coupon
Dozen 1/2 Large Eggs $1.85

Somewhere along the way I had $0.95 taken off.....because my total was $7.28 w/ tax. What a terrible shopping trip - I am going to call the manager today to let them know that I wasn't charged for most of my stuff and originally the total was $22.29? I wasn't being mean or anything, but that kid was flustered!

Mothering Boys pt. 2

2009-03-04T15:47:00.004-06:00

This will not be a glowing post about mothering boys, this is a complaint, a call for help, a mother's plea for assistance......PLEASE!

Why are boys so physical? Why must they work things out by jumping on, pushing, hitting, biting, etc.

This morning Noah pushed Logan to get the "good seat" in the back seat of the car. Yesterday Logan hit another little boy because the other little boy was teasing Noah....which was hard to fight because he was sticking up for his little brother and he said that they were trying to walk away. And then today, Logan got into a fight with another little boy because the other little boy was calling him names. Again, that's tough to fight because he was getting teased, however, it's not how you should handle the situation.

I will talk to him about this, about how using violence to fight violence is never the answer, I will help him to see alternatives for handling situations like this.......I will probably pull my hair out before he ever "gets it".

This is one area of mothering boys that I don't get - they solve everything physically and as a woman I want to "talk it out". Where is the balance? How can I find a happy medium for all of us? Can I cure cancer and rid of worldwide hunger while I'm at it? UGH, mothering boys is tough!

Weekly Grocery Round-Up.....part of it at least!

2009-03-04T13:13:00.005-06:00

Well, I blew the $75.00 grocery challenge on Friday afternoon as I was looking for comfort, convenience, and food that would allow our family to spend quality time with our dog that night (seriously, I'm so sorry that my posts have been so depressing lately......dare I tell you how emotional I just got leaving Meijer - the greeter lady's name was Millie and I cried! AHH!). Anyway, a run to Wal-Mart Friday afternoon with the boys resulted in the purchase of DiGiornio pizza's, Frosty Paws (for Millie & Lucy), salty snacks (for me), and ice cream (for me too!). And I think I went over by $5.00....but I justified it!

Today I went to the store for the first part of my grocery shopping this week - I will name it the first leg of my $75 weekly challenge - it sounds more interesting! ha! I will post the rest of my "legs" when I get around to them.....I won't remind you that I'm not feeling much like myself this week! ; (

Meijer
Freezer Bag (WHY DO I KEEP FORGETTING MINE!) $2.29
Kraft Shells & Cheese (2) $4.70
Kraft Macaroni & Cheese (4) Free w/ coupon
Meijer French Fries 32 oz. bag Free w/ purchase
Smart Balance Cooking Spray $1.89 w/ coupon
Smart Balance Butter (2) $3.00 w/ coupon
Smart Balance Butter Sticks Free w/ coupon
Smart Balance Popcorn (2) $1.69 w/ coupon & Buy one, get one free
Hebrew National Hot Dogs $2.99 w/ coupon
Green Grapes 1.91 lb. $1.89
Loaf Arnold Potato Bread $0.79 w/ coupon
Thomas English Muffins $0.25 w/ coupon
Baked Cheetos $2.00 w/ coupon
Tyson Bag Breaded Chicken Strips (2) $8.25 w/ coupon

Total w/ tax $29.42

I bought some things that weren't a great deal - but used coupons or bought them as a part of a promotion....the hot dogs, shells & cheese, Baked Lays, and another blasted freezer bag to hold my frozen foods while I work - but I still have $45.58 left in my budget and I know that I don't have that much to buy this week really. With store promotions, non-coupon savings, and coupon savings - my total savings at Meijer was $30.37. So not too bad! Plus I got bread & english muffins for super cheap with coupons, free Kraft Mac & Cheese, and lots of the Smart Balance products were either free or a great deal.

I will tell you that while shopping, I saw a lady with several containers of chicken breasts and ground chicken with the BIG ORANGE STICKERS BLARING 40% off......so my frugal self rushed right over to the meat counter to check out the chicken and when I realized that she had cleaned out the clearance chicken I think I mumbled some not nice words under my breath! ha! She beat me to a bargain darn it! And then I pulled myself together, reminded myself that I did not need meat this week and I didn't have anywhere to put it while I was at work and then I grumbled a congratulations! ha! ha!

Again, I will post the rest of my frugal finds later......there isn't much this week as I am still using reserves of pasta, meat, yogurt, etc., but I know you are all just waiting on the edge of your seats! ha! ha!

I hope you are having a wonderful day!

Angela

Random Bits of Life

2009-03-03T11:02:00.006-06:00

#1 As you all know, our little family is grieving the loss of our loving 12-year old dog Millie. We continue to talk about our good memories of her and I've only cried a little bit today....I miss her, we had a routine for 11 years and it's tough not to notice she's there.

#2 We have all be so sick lately - colds, strep throat, bronchitis, croup, flu....I swear there are 25 different types of medicines on our counter and I need a notebook to keep track of them to make sure nobody is overdosing or taking someone else's medicines.

#3 MICE - to add to the stress of the weekend, while sitting in a chair with Millie on Friday night I caught sight of a mouse gingerly walking across our fireplace...very close to where Millie was. In my head I was screaming "Millie, wake up baby, this is your last chance to prove to me that you can hunt" (see this post for details). Seeing as she couldn't hear and that I didn't want her last night with me to be in the bath following the bloodshed, I went to the store and bought 8 mousetraps - why that many you ask - because I wanted to catch that sucker! Over the course of the weekend we caught 4 and I feel disgusting.....our house is clean, I have vacuumed a million times, shut down food operations outside of the kitchen/dining room, and my husband keeps reminding me that it's not because we're dirty. So far the traps have been empty for the past 2 days, but they are still set and ready for action, and my handy man husband has done something near our kitchen window that he thinks might help.

#4 I have to laugh at myself......you know, I really have blonde moments sometimes that are just so funny.

Here is an example of my true hair color - Two weeks ago a guy I went to school with IM'd me on Facebook and asked me if I had a date for the class reunion we have this summer. I responded to him that I would probably be going with my husband, to which he quickly responded, "I wanted to know the date of the reunion, I wasn't asking you out". Oh, duh!

Go ahead and laugh, it's okay - I did!

#5 Marathon/Half-Marathon - because I've been sick and am still sick along with a terrible backache, my marathon hopes have been cut to half-marathon hopes. I was pushing it to train for the marathon in 12-weeks, and just hope that I get better in time enough to do the half. Seems that my immune system is pretty weak this season and the stress of what we went through recently has really flared up my lupus.

#6 Summer is coming.....there is a time change this weekend, the sun is shining brighter, there is warmer weather (I am thinking 30 degrees is warmer, maybe I'm delusional!), and the kids are just chomping at the bit to get outside and I'm more than happy to send them! I'm looking forward to cookouts with our friends, bike rides, playing in the field behind our house, t-ball/baseball games, opening windows and feeling the breeze, fishing at my parents lake, and getting our garden in (aptly named Millie's Garden).

My Weekend

2009-03-02T09:28:00.009-06:00

I had one of those emotional, sobbing uncontrollably, crying at the drop of the hat, and feeling as though your heart was breaking into a million pieces.

Randy and I took our sweet Millie on Saturday and as I promised Logan, I stayed by her side the entire time because I never wanted her to feel scared, alone, or confused by what was going on. It was tough and I can't even begin to tell you how difficult it was for me. There were lots of tears during my phone calls to my sister and my mom - both cried and felt my pain as Millie was loved by everyone. And the pain and tears are still coming today and I have a feeling it will be awhile before life feels somewhat normal again.

I know that not everyone can relate to the relationship that I had with Millie, some people are not pet people, but before I had children I was one of those semi-nutty dog people. Our dogs are important to us and are a part of our family and because at 19 I was told that children might not be possible, I viewed our dogs at the time as the ones I would nurture and love as though they were my children.

Following the events Saturday morning I found myself in pain all over, it's my Lupus flaring up because of the stress of our situation with Millie. My joints ache, my immune system is down, and my back hurts....I just pray that this goes away soon as I would like to continue training for the half-marathon. Because I've been sick, it's really not possible for me to do the full marathon in April now, but the half marathon is still a possibility. And the running would be a great release for these emotions that I'm experiencing now.

I did meet friends out for a bit to celebrate a birthday and Randy and I went to an Illini Basketball game where I yelled at the refs, cheered, and supported our team the best I could, but I am grieving and it hurts. When I was laying on the couch I reached down for my friend that was always there laying right next to me, when I was in the kitchen I would always be on the lookout for the one who was always under my feet, when the kids were eating I didn't have anyone to clean up their mess on the floor for me, and every morning I had one less little one to take care of.

I know that this loss and my grieving might seem strange to some and I thought a lot about my friends that have lost children and how they might deem my feelings as silly, but for 11 years I loved, nurtured, and took care of Millie as though she were my child.....and my pain and grief is real and that's all I know.

If you are having any saddness or experiencing grief today....know that I am feeling for you.

My Millie

2009-02-28T09:39:00.002-06:00

It has been scheduled.....the last moments that I will spend with my dog Millie.....I'm so heartbroken. Here is our story.

One Sunday in March 1998, my then fiance Randy and I got into a fight - over what, I don't know...who knows - what did we have to fight about before children? Back then when we would get into a fight I would go for a drive, I don't do that now because it would require loading up the kids, probably have to stop at McDonald's for a snack, and I would have to listen to them fight over what they wanted to listen to on the radio.....so not as relaxing as it once was! ha!

Anyway, I went for a drive and ended up at the local humane society. I wandered through the rooms looking at the animals and they were all barking, jumping, and saying "look at me, look at me" - very heartbreaking. I turned a corner in one room and there was this silky white dog with a little bit of black and brown on her face just sitting in the middle of her cage with her head cocked to the side as if she was saying "Hello". My heart melted, I could tell right away that she was a sweet dog and when I read her information she was a year and 3 months, good with kids, other dogs, etc., and was given up because she wouldn't hunt? Well, I didn't need a hunting dog.....so I took her for a walk, played with her for a bit, and fell in love.

We had a Great Dane at the time and before they would let me adopt her, we had to do a meet and greet with the two dogs. Our Great Dane was not easy to get along with and I worried that she wouldn't get along with this dog, amazingly enough she did. The two of them would grow to be great buddies and would play for hours together.

This dogs name at the shelter was Millie and I just liked it, so I kept it for her. I can't imagine her as anything else but Millie. She is an English Setter mix and has been a wonderful addition to our whole family.

When my grandmother was alive, I would take Millie over there and my grandma would just pet her and love her - Millie is very gentle. In the 11 years we have had her, she's never bared her teeth, growled, or anything along those lines.

My mom, who is not a pet person, loves Millie, and so does my dad. They just think she's the perfect dog. We had to live with them for a few days between selling/buying our first and second homes and I would come home to find Millie down at the lake with my dad - both of them just as happy as could be!

When the children were born, she never bothered their toys or them for that matter. She would quietly sit in the room with me while I fed them, as they got older she would wait under their highchairs knowing that they would eventually drop something for her.

In the past few years, Millie has slowed down, and the past 6 months - her health has been getting worse and worse. This fall she had a seizure in front of my husband and we thought she had died, we changed her food, I even cooked for her for awhile.....but she's had others since then. She is unable to control her bowels anymore, and I know it embarrasses her. She's having difficulty getting up and down the two little steps it takes for her to go outside. And now that she's 12, the veterinarians are telling us, there's not much that can be done for her.

We are trying to prepare the children for this, I read them the Rainbow Bridge story last night and could barely make it through without sobbing. I told them that we are going to write stories about her and draw pictures for her. And we will pick out a memorial for her to put in our yard, maybe a little bench or something to put in the garden where she would shake and whimper every time she saw a bunny or a squirrel.

Little did I know that almost 11 years ago I would meet the sweetest, most lovable dog in the world and that she would save me more than I saved her. I thank God everyday for the blessings in my life, and that includes Millie, and always will.

What are you giving up?

2009-02-26T12:58:00.003-06:00

I am Catholic and yesterday being Ash Wednesday kicked off the Lenten Celebration that will continue for 40 days until Easter. During that time we try to focus on sacrifices and without getting too religious and sparking debate, we give up something during that time. Well, I can't decide what to give up and Ash Wednesday has passed.

My children said they would give up candy....I doubt that will actually happen given they have a birthday party this weekend and several others during the 40 days. I read yesterday where Amy at MomAdvice.com issued a no-spend challenge for her and her family during the month of February and others have joined. This means - outside of food, gas, and utilities - no spending. No new clothes, no eating out, no impulse purchases at the grocery store, no birthday gifts, no nothing.....she is using her own resources to fill these "voids" - handmade gifts, homemade "take out" food, etc. I jumped on the bandwagon for this thinking that I could totally give up extra spending for Lent.....then I jumped off.

Is it fear? If so, what am I afraid of? I don't spend extra really, well, not all the time, but I am already very frugal - could I just make "Watching my spending even closer" my sacrifice versus "No extra spending" - it seems so final, so rigid, so not possible! How about I could give up spending any money on extra stuff Monday thru Thursday?

I don't know what I'm giving up yet, I'm hoping at some point during the 40 days I will figure it out.....I know I have the option of doing more of something - and there again I struggle because don't I do enough already?

As a side note....I didn't spend any money yesterday AND I went to the mall on my lunch hour and walked out of Victoria's Secret with a new pair of underwear and a small thing of lotion.....I had coupons for both and I practically skipped to the car because I was so excited! The sales lady did her very best to sell me a bra to go with the underwear, but even with my $10 off coupon, the bra was $19.50 and I couldn't justify it....I'm happy with my Wal-Mart Hanes Her Way Bras at $9! ha!

Week 2 - $75 Week Grocery Challenge

2009-02-25T09:40:00.008-06:00

Okay....I am in week 2 of the $75 Week Grocery Challenge and here are the results for this week!

IGA
Dozen & a half Eggs $2.00

Total - $2.13

County Market -
Cinnamon Chex $2.99
Trix (the result of having a little one with me!) $2.79
Fiber One Shredded Wheat $2.50
4 28 oz. cans Hunts Tomatoes $3.96
3 15 oz. cans generic Tomatoes w/ chiles $1.98
2 45 oz. containers Ragu Pasta Sauce $3.92 w/ store coupon
Can of Beef Gravy $0.99
Juicy Juice Grape Juice (again...little one!) $3.29
HomeLife 8-roll Paper Towels $4.99
1.81 lbs. Grapes $1.79
1 donut (again, never take children shopping with you) $0.68
2 gallons skim milk $3.98
3 8oz. Borden Shredded Cheese $6.00

Cinnamon Chex Coupon -$0.75
Fiber One Coupon -$0.75

Total - $39.01

Meijer
Frozen Strawberries $2.39
Frozen Mangoes $1.69
20 Yoplait Yogurts $10.00
Cascade Dishwashing Detergent $3.59
Popsicles $2.50
Clearance Valentine's Frog Candy (for Easter baskets) $0.98
Yoplait Yogurt Coupons -$2.00
Cascade Coupon -$1.00

Total - $18.61

So, with $15.25 remaining in my budget and all of the stuff I was able to get last week during my first week of the challenge - I don't think I will have to use the rest. I am stocked up on all of the essentials for a little while and surprisingly, I am finding that by being organized, planning out menus, and going in with a list - I am not wondering down each aisle thinking "Do we need that?", "Did I just use the last of that?", and I'm not over buying.

Good luck with your shopping!

Angela

Monday Munchies

2009-02-23T09:47:00.005-06:00

My co-worker Sheryl always brings me the neatest cookbooks to look through and this morning was no exception, she brought me Taste of Home Casseroles, Slow Cooker & Soups to look through. All of my great buys last week on meat has left me with menu planning and I didn't do any of that this weekend - so her timing was perfect!

There are some great main dish recipes that are in this, but for a change I thought I would share with you a side dish recipe.....because aren't we always looking for a good side dish?

This one is simple, easy, and can be done in the crock pot! Enjoy!

Creamed Corn

2 pkg. frozen corn (one 16 ounces and one 10 ounces)
1 pkg. cream cheese (8 ounces), softened and cubed
1/4 c. butter, cubed
1 Tb. sugar
1 tsp. salt

In a 3 qt. slow cooker coated with cooking spray, combine all ingredients. cover and cook on low for 3 to 3-1/2 hours or until cheese is melted and corn is tender. Stir just before serving.

The mystery of the pants

2009-02-21T08:28:00.003-06:00

Last night when we got home there were two pair of pants sitting by our front door. They are too small for Logan, but Noah will grow into them quicker than I want him to - so I put them on the shelf with the other "attic bound" clothes. No note, no phone call, no ideas.....but this is all a part of living in a small town.

I live in a community of about 3,000 people, I have family in this town, friends that I've known my whole life, and acquaintances that I know more about than I care to. And finding gifts on your front porch is something that is not uncommon here - you find clothes like I did last night, one time I found a big garbage bag of Barney VHS tapes because someone knew that Noah loved Barney and their child must have grown out of them, you will find tomatoes, corn, beans, etc. when gardens are overflowing with veggies, people look out for your kids, your pets, your house when you are out of town, and there is a real sense of community here.

I cannot imagine living in a city where I don't know my neighbors, everyone feels like a stranger, and the buildings around you seem bigger than the sky. Where I live there are corn fields, soccer/football/baseball fields, I can see my work from my kitchen window and it's a little over 10 miles away....my building is reaallly big!, the tallest thing in my town is a grain bin in the middle of town and you hardly recognize it's there until it's harvest time and you can hear it running all hours of the day. I think it's so funny to try and give my friends directions in this town....the friends that have only lived here for two years or so, I say things like "Do you know where the old grade school was" or "Take a left at the corner by Smith's old house" - they have no idea what or who I'm talking about! ha!

We don't have a Starbucks on every corner, there are more taverns than I care to admit, there is one stop light, and the one thing that would make this town perfect is if someone would open up a hardware store again because it's inconvenient to go "to town" just to buy nails. What this town has to offer isn't convenience, it's community - and that's what I love the most. Now, I won't break into John Cougar Mellencamp's "Small Town" or anything, but the lyrics are very fitting for how I feel about my town.

And just think - two pair of mysterious pants made me think about all of this! ha! Have a great weekend!

Angela

Weekend Recipe

2009-02-20T10:43:00.005-06:00

I found a fun recipe that I am going to try tonight and I think it will be fun for the boys to help me with it. Although, like Nicole at Here's The Diehl, I do find that cooking with the children never turns out like you imagine it would! But, I keep trying! ha!

I happen to have ground beef, Grands biscuits, taco seasoning, sour cream, and salsa on hand. I will make a run to the store for some shredded cheese...I still have $1.02 left in my $75 Weekly Grocery Budget and a coupon, so maybe I will be able to stay under the $75!

TACO CUPS

1 1/2 lb lean ground beef
1 package (1.25 oz) taco seasoning mix
1/2 cup water
1 can refrigerated buttermilk biscuits
1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese
1/2 cup shredded lettuce, if desired
1/2 cup chopped tomato, if desired
1/2 cup sour cream, if desired
1/2 cup salsa, if desired

DIRECTIONS

1. Heat oven to 375°F. Brown ground beef in large skillet over medium-high heat until thoroughly cooked, stirring frequently. Drain.

2. Add taco seasoning mix and water; mix well. Reduce heat to medium; simmer 10 minutes or until ground beef mixture is slightly thickened, stirring occasionally.

3. Meanwhile, spray outside bottom and sides of 8 muffin tins cups lightly with nonstick cooking spray. Separate dough into 8 biscuits. Roll or pat each biscuit to form 4 1/2-inch round. Place rounds over outside of sprayed cups; press to fit over bottom and part way down sides of cups. Place cups, upside down, in ungreased 15x10x1-inch baking pan.

4. Bake at 375°F. for 14 to 16 minutes or until deep golden brown. Remove pan from oven. Carefully remove biscuit cups from muffin tins. Place biscuit cups, right side up, in same baking pan and spoon beef mixture evenly into each cup.

5. Top with cheese, lettuce, tomato, sour cream and salsa.

Random bits of life

2009-02-19T13:53:00.004-06:00

#1 As a follow up to my "$75.00 weekly challenge" post - I finished my grocery shopping for this week and here are the results - I had $7.93 remaining in my $75.00 weekly budget and spent the following today:

$3.02 @ Schnuck's - 10 lbs. potatoes
$1.86 @ County Market - 2 boxes County Market Brand Mac & Cheese $0.29 per box
3.83 lbs. bananas for $0.33/lb.
$2.03 @ Walgreen's - 2 Yes To Carrots Lip Balms (-$4.00 Coupons)
Container Buffalo Wild Wing Pringles $0.45

This brings my total grocery expenses to $73.98 leaving me $1.02 in my budget to carry over to next week. My purchases at Walgreen's today were more of a luxury thing - I had the coupons for the lip balm and they were on sale, and then I'm a little stressed right now and reached out for the comfort food (i.e., salty chips) - however, they were on clearance for $0.45, and that my friends is cheap therapy!

So, pat me on the back for today....let's hope I can continue doing so well every week!

#2 I mentioned stress, well, now that I've eaten an entire container of Pringles....I think I have the strength to tell you. (Yes, judge me all you want, I ate the whole thing - as if you've never done that!) Our elderly dog Millie is sick again. We have gone through this several times with her and we have reached a decision that is so unbelievably difficult for me. I thought I had blogged about her before....apparently not. Well, Millie is our 12 year old dog that we got from the Humane Society. She spent her first year and three months with another family and then we found her and saved her and she has been the absolute best dog ever....even though she runs away a lot (she's a hunting dog, she can't help it!). Anyway, she has had arthritis issues, seizures, hearing loss, and now she is losing control of her bowels. I will post more about her at another time....right now it's just too hard.

#3 I have to figure out how to make our mornings less challenging....Logan was whining when he woke up, Noah was great, Logan ate his scrambled eggs without a peep, Noah threw a fit because they had the wrong kind of cheese....GRRR! I refuse to give up my preference on making them a healthy breakfast to start their day.

That's all I needed to get off my chest for the moment....hope your day is going well!

Angela

The Poopy Teach and Tell Project

2009-02-19T09:15:00.002-06:00

My oldest son Logan has to do a two minute speech every Thursday in his first grade class. Toys, games, and other items of the sort a strictly forbidden.....you have to teach your classmates something or relay some kind of educational information about something or somewhere.

This of course falls onto my shoulders. I have searched the internet far and wide for practical projects that my son could demonstrate in class and it's actually been quite fun - we've learned that Logan can make his own peanut butter sandwich, peel an orange, make his own microwave popcorn in a brown lunch bag, tie his shoes, make some fun green goo, etc. Well I had in my hands a recipe for edible playdough on Tuesday night and since Wednesday night is busy with religion class and this week an Illini game - Tuesday night is typically our night to create and/or practice our teach and tell - so I sat both boys down at the table armed with the ingredients -

Peanut Butter
Cocoa Powder
Milk Powder
Honey

There is a recipe that you could follow, but I just improvised given I didn't have as much of the stuff as it called for. We made do with what we had. You can also give the children nuts, raisins, dried fruit, etc. to make faces or other creations with your "dough".

I gave the children rolling pins, ice cream scoops, cookie cutters and for about 20 minutes they just played, laughed, snacked a little, etc. (BTW - this stuff is really yummy - my husband declined a taste test though.)

After the children were done, I took the empty peanut butter jar and put the "dough" in it and labeled it with Logan's name. I then looked at it again.....it looked like poop in a jar. I did not take a picture of it, but I guarantee you would agree with me. Logan and I got a good giggle out of this and I said "I can't send this with you....it looks like poop in a jar!" - so I squeezed this out of the jar, which made us giggle even harder, and placed it in a Glad container thinking that it would look better in that.

I put together copies of the recipe for Logan to hand out to his class and sent him to school today with his Edible Playdough, a.k.a. The Poopy Teach and Tell, and I just know that during the course of his speech, he will tell everyone that it looks like poop. The joys of being the mother to boys - a girl would think it's gross, boys think it's funny!

Mothering Boys

2009-02-18T09:33:00.008-06:00

On a blog that I read every day....I have been placed under her "Oh boys" section and it got me thinking about mothering boys and what a challenge it is for me. So, I decided to blog about it because if you are a blogger, you know that this is therapy, cheap therapy!

When we were blessed with our first little boy, I was thrilled, I tried to teach him to be compassionate and thoughtful, but I also can be found teaching him how to dribble between his legs and how to hold a bat because I am kind of a tomboy - I like to think of myself as well rounded as a mother.

When we were blessed with a second pregnancy I seemed to fall into the mindset of everyone around us "Oh, it's a girl", "You are having a girl"......I went as far as buying lots of girls clothes and all of the little frilly things that go with it, but in the back of my mind, I wasn't sure about mothering a little girl. We went for the sonogram to reveal the sex of the baby and when she said it was a boy, I felt a little relieved - I knew boys, I had gone through almost two years raising a little boy, and it was familiar to me.

Now with both of my boys having grown to the ages of 7 and 5, I find that each day is a new challenge and our children are completely opposite of one another - so that alone poses a challenge in itself! Our oldest son, Logan, is emotional, caring, compassionate, thoughtful, shy and although he can be quite stubborn, he is a very sweet boy. Our youngest son, Noah, is very spirited, social, smart, comedic, and again, a bit stubborn, but very sweet. They clash a lot, but Logan is always watching out for Noah and Noah is always finding that when he's scared that his "bubby" is one of the first people he looks for. I have to keep reminding myself that my sister and I had a love/hate relationship when we were younger and today we are the best of friends - I hope the same for my children.

Like I said - there are challenges every day with the boys, although I have said they are not as emotional as girls, they do have their moments. They are emotional, spirited, complex, and some times they are just flat out confusing! But I know that despite the bad days when I feel like I've failed as a mother (we've all had those days), I know that I'm blessed because I get to raise to boys and hopefully can raise them to be good men. I just realized that I have said "I" and "Me" a lot - but my husband of course has been totally involved in rearing the children and has taught them a lot, but this post is about mothering! ; ) I just wanted to point out that my partner in all of this has been awesome!

So yesterday morning after an emotional morning with our oldest, I explained to them on the way to school that God gives us challenges and it's our job to figure out how to handle them. And there isn't anything that he gives us that he doesn't think we can't handle. And that there is a lesson in everything and what I had learned from our morning was that Logan only likes banana bread when it is in the form of a mini muffin and prefers to eat a more mature version of yogurt - not the one with Diego on it, he would prefer SpongeBob. After I dropped them off I felt like my words had flown over their heads and landed in someone else's car - but I had done my best to teach them.

When I picked the children up from their after school program Noah told me that one of his friends had choked him on the bus ride after school and that he had to push him to in order to save himself. We talked about it a little bit and Noah said "Mommy, I didn't want to push him, but I knew that God was challenging me and knew that I could handle it" - so it did land. Some times as a mother, or as a parent in general, our lessons may not have an immediate return or result - but in time you will see what your children have learned from you.

I know that I am blessed to be a mother to boys, it's a challenge that I know I have the ability to handle. I look forward to each stage in their lives and being a part of each moment. And I can't wait to see what kind of men that they grow up to be.

$75.00 a week challenge

2009-02-17T22:47:00.006-06:00

Okay, I am challenging myself.......I am setting my grocery budget for my family of 4 to $75.00 a week. In the past the weekly grocery shopping was double that, if not more - I tend to have my grandmothers mentality on this "you must be able to feed an army at a moments notice" - so our pantry/fridge/freezer is always full. Well, I've been inspired by so many to plan, be resourceful, and to make the most out of every morsel you have - so I've set this goal for myself and am really excited!

Like I have said in the past, I aspire to be one of those women that goes into the grocery store, loads the cart up with $200 worth of groceries and ends up paying $1.54. So I bought a binder and have transformed myself into one of those ladies.....it just makes me giggle because it excites me - organizing, saving money, couponing, etc. excites me! Oh my! ha! ha! But hey, I'm saving money, feeding my family, and am being smart....so if that's ridiculous, then so be it!

I don't have pictures of anything because I'm having technical difficulties with my camera - there is a memory card trapped in there with some great pictures, so I'm working on it! But here is a running total of my purchases for my inagural week of my $75 Challenge - just use your imagination to visualize the items! ha! ha!

Schnucks
Suave Mousse $1.34
Dr. Pepper 2 ltr. $1..25
5.76 lbs. Split Chicken Breast $5.70
7.42 lbs. Pork Roast $7.35

Suave Product Coupon -$3.00
Free 2-liter Dr. Pepper -$1.59
(I'm not sure why, but the store gave me the value of the coupon vs. the actual cost of the product?)
Total w/ tax: $11.36

IGA
2 Prairie Farms Orange Juice (1/2 gallon) $2.00
2 Prairie Farms Chocolate Milk (Pint)$2.00
3 New York Garlic Bread Sticks $4.98

3 New York Garlic Bread Coupons -$1.50
Total w/ tax: $7.59

Walmart
2 Pillsbury Valentine's Ready to Bake Sugar Cookies $2.00
2 Starkist Tuna Pouches $1.86
2 Starkist Flavored Tuna Pouches $3.04

Coupon for Pillsbury Cookies -$0.75
4 Coupons for Starkist Tuna -$4.00
Total w/ tax: $2.22

Meijer
Cascade Rinse Agent $3.74
2 lbs. Ground Beef $3.82
4 Chuck Roast Steaks $3.76
2.5 lb. Bottom Round Roast $4.79
4.44 lbs. Fuji Apples $4.44
Fresh Mushrooms $1.00
Fresh Broccoli $1.00
Crate of Tangerines $4.00
2 Quaker Rice Cake Tortillas $2.00
2 lbs. Baby Carrots $2.00
Green Giant Frozen Creamed Spinach $1.00
Green Giant Broccoli w/ Butter Sauce $1.00
Dog Rawhide $4.23
2 Meijer Brand Sandwich Bags $2.00
2 Meijer Brand Snack Bags $2.00
2 Gallons Meijer 2% Milk $4.00
4 Loaves Aunt Millie's Bread $5.00
2 Pkg. Angel Soft Toilet Paper $2.00

Green Giant Broccoli w/ Butter Sauce -$1.00
(Buy 10, Get 11th item free)
Coupon Green Giant Frozen Vegetables -$0.50
Coupon Green Giant Frozen Vegetables -$0.50
Coupon Quaker Rice Cake Tortillas -$0.50
Coupon Quaker Rice Cake Tortillas -$1.00
Coupon Cascade Rinse Agent -$3.74
Total w/ tax: $45.90

With $7.93 remaining, I still have to buy a 10 lb. bag of potatoes for $2.49 from Schnucks and bananas from County Market that are on sale for $0.39/lb. So overall, for my first week, I think I've done great! I am using supplies on hand of pasta, rice, etc. and as those things run out I will include them on future shopping trips. Hopefully I can stay on track as doing this will help me to meet other financial goals I have set for myself this year.

Take a good look at yourself

2009-02-17T09:42:00.004-06:00

Right now I'm still sick and it's frustrating me.....I can't function when I'm sick, I don't have time to be sick.....but I'm sick! Grrr! It's more of a sinus/head cold combo now - the strep throat is gone and it's morphed into this - I'm dealing!

However, in my Dayquil/Green Tea/Amoxicillin fog, I have been taking a good hard look at my "goals" for the year and just seeing where I'm at in all of this. You have to check in with yourself every once in awhile and make sure you are on the right track - so that's what I've been doing.

#1 Pay off debt - I'm doing really well here, I have budgeted a little extra each month to go towards debt and it's paying off....ha! Literally paying off! I don't use credit cards, I am frugal with groceries, etc., I watch our money closely and one of our hurdles will be tackled at the end of this month already.....so it's working! We didn't create our debt overnight, so unfortunately, it won't be taken care of overnight - it will take some time, but there is a plan in place and I can see the end of it all - so that's definitely a step in the right direction!

#2 Lose weight/Exercise more - I have been able to lose weight since the holidays because I've been exercising more. I had every intention of running a marathon in April - I was cutting it close by having only 12-weeks to train and since I've been sick, I haven't run at all - so I'm thinking that I will only be able to run the half-marathon in April and will possibly attempt the Chicago marathon in October.....working in athletics means the Fall is a busy time with football, so I will have to check my schedule to see if it's possible. So I feel like I'm on track with this one - I'm hoping to lose a little more before the summer - I want to feel comfortable in my shorts/bathing suit/tank tops.

#3 Go green - I am proud to say that I've been doing well in this area. I've introduced organic foods into our diets.....my husband wants to know what the difference is! ha! I have changed our soaps, lotions, and hair care products to more natural ones and have in fact noticed less itching in my scalp and my skin feels really good. I have made our laundry detergent and it works really well, no complaints from the hubby, and it's cheap! I am finding alternatives to harsh chemicals in our cleaning products and our house still smells nice! These are small changes, but they are something! Next task is to start getting serious about recycling!

#4 Be frugal - This kind of goes with #1 and #3......but it's more than just being smart with our money and finding alternatives to things in the store - it's figuring out how to plan your meals around what is on sale, whether or not your coupons will give you the best deal, and teaching your children and yourself that you are surrounding with resources that provide you with a good life without spending money every day. I have found beauty tips using household goods, craft ideas for my children by recycling toilet paper rolls, paper bags, etc., again, making my own household cleaners, and I am not as wasteful with things.

For instance, when we have apples that are starting to go soft - I know that nobody will eat them, so I peel them up, throw them in the crock pot with a little sugar and cinnamon and make applesauce that everyone likes. I make my own chicken stock with the split chicken breasts that are on sale for usually $0.99/lb. - and I use this in soups, stews, etc. I use our crock pot a lot - last night I stretched out a steak that would have barely fed the 4 of us at dinner - I put it in the crock pot with a can of baked beans, a cup of rice, a little water, some roasted red peppers, barbecue sauce, and some seasonings - it shredded up and we rolled it in tortillas. There was enough for dinner and lunches today for my husband and I.

I'm definitely learning how to be frugal and I really wish that I would have been practicing these things all along.....but it's better late than never right?

So take a good look at yourself today and your goals. Change things up if you need to and make sure you are on the right track. The security guard in our office said something to me yesterday morning that perked me up a little and made me giggle.....and I will say it to you today - "We are all in our places with fresh, shining faces" - happy Tuesday!

Angela

I am finally sick....blah!

2009-02-13T19:19:00.002-06:00

I've had several friends lately with flu, strep, colds, etc. - and I've been a little full of myself thinking that it would eventually catch up with me. Well, the dull headache and scratchy throat that plagued me all day yesterday because more intense as the night wore on and I began having a deep cough and low-grade fevers.

So, a day off of work today, a trip to convenient care, and lots of rest for the weekend. Sorry honey, no kisses for you!

I am headed to bed....at 7:21 p.m. on a Friday night - not that I'm complaining! ha! ha!

Have a wonderful weekend and I hope you have a very Happy Valentine's Day!

Love - Angela

How not to use coupons

2009-02-12T12:42:00.002-06:00

That's right - I said "HOW NOT TO USE COUPONS". I am a smart person, but every now and then I do dumb things.....so I am admitting that to you right now. Here are my top 3 coupon mistakes.....learn from them!

#1 Make sure that you understand when Walgreens says it will give you $6.00 back when you buy a certain brand of razors and you have to buy 3, you should buy them all separately and not together. Not even if you are in a hurry and trying to run errands in a 45 minute time frame. Rather than getting $18.00 total, you will only get $6.00....DUH?!

#2 Make sure that the brand of jelly that is on sale matches the brand of jelly on your coupon. This will save you minor embarrassment at the checkout counter with 25 impatient people standing behind you.

#3 Make sure that you really look at the dates of the sales in the stores.....two of the stores in my hour typically run a special sale Thursday - Saturday and this week they changed it up on me and ran the special sale on Friday only....thus I was standing in line today trying to buy 4 of the sale items that don't go on sale until tomorrow. Again, embarrassing!

Happy Thursday!

Angela

And I survived another Monday......

2009-02-10T09:42:00.002-06:00

Mondays are just crazy.....the kids go back to school, my husband and I head off to work, I have a laundry list of "to do's" for the week, speaking of laundry - there's laundry, dinners, lunches to pack, bills to pay, homework to do, blah, blah, blah. Well, I survived - we all did - and next Monday there is no school, so we won't have to survive another one for a little bit! ha!

The one light in my Mondays....is hula dancing. My beautiful friend Jill is super talented and has been hula dancing since she was 7 years old. She has formed a dance group between some of my other beautiful and talented friends and we get together every Monday night and perfect our routine. Last night I think we were all a little goofy and we were just cracking each other up! The camaraderie and laughter was much needed to close out a hectic day.

You know, there was a time when my kids were little and I felt so consumed by babies, diapers, feedings, working outside of the home, etc. - and I felt like I didn't have any good friends to lean on. I had my sister of course, thank goodness, but it's nice to have some good girl friends to lean on, be silly with, and just to know that there are people out there who relate to your situation. In the last year and a half I have met some of the most wonderful people and the great thing is that our husbands and children enjoy spending time together too! How lucky!

So I am holding up my coffee toast this morning to good family, good friends, and surviving another Monday! Cheers!

Angela

Weekend Recap

2009-02-09T14:14:00.005-06:00

Friday night/Saturday morning - RASCAL FLATTS! woo hoo! I was able to go to the Rascal Flatts concert on Friday night with some of my favorite people. It was a great time and Jessica Simpson opened for them.....UM, if she is overweight/fat/obese - then our countries standards for weight needs to change ASAP! She is great looking and put on a good show! Rascal Flatts, well, they were just okay......JUST KIDDING - the rocked and put on an AMAZING show! Totally worth the money for floor seats!

Afterwards I chauffeured my friends around so they could drink and have a good time and we ended up staying out until 3:00 a.m. - we were talking, being silly, dancing on bars....all completely innocent! ha! ha! I happily delivered them safely home and never once regretted losing a few hours of sleep to make more memories with my girls!

Saturday.....aah, a lazy day! Noah got a chance to go to a friends house and spend the day - he just really enjoys getting to do stuff like this because he's seen his older brother do this and wants so badly to grow up. Randy and Logan ran some errands, got their hair cut, etc., and I relaxed and did some things around the house. I made a big batch of soup and we just relaxed and kicked back in the evening. It was great! I didn't ever take a nap like I thought I would, but I did get to lay around a bit and enjoy the quiet.

Sunday - what a beautiful day! I was supposed to get 10 miles in, well, I did 5 miles - there was a little incident with "black ice" and I slipped and hurt my back, so I cut my run in half - but TOTALLY loved running outside - I definitely run faster outside and the fresh air was great! So I got that done, sent Randy to the Illini game, sent the boys outside, continued to do a few things around the house, then we had a birthday party to go to with our friends - kind of our first "Sunday dinner" of the year.

It was a great weekend, but I definitely feel like I was hit by a truck due to the lack of sleep on Friday! But again, it was worth it! ; )

Hope you have a great week!

Angela

P.S. My favorite quote from the weekend: in response to Noah going to his friend Abel's house on Saturday I said "Now all we need is someone named Cain and Moses to stop by" - ha! ha! I crack myself up!

Rascall Flatts, Jessica Simpson, 6 good friends, and a pair of red high heels.......

2009-02-06T11:04:00.007-06:00

'nuff said! I'm looking forward to going to the concert tonight with some of my good friends, listening to some great music from our FLOOR SEATS, wearing my hot new top and my red high heels, and taking a break from the stresses of life.

After that - it's typical weekend stuff, laundry, vacuuming, get the boys' hair cut, take Noah to a play day, church, gathering with friends for a birthday celebration, Illini game.....but for tonight - for a few hours, I'm going to let my hair down and kick up my heels a bit!

Have a wonderful weekend and send prayers my way that I survive my 10 mile run on Sunday....it will be my longest in the training so far! EEK!

Tootles!

Angela

Running Update

2009-02-04T09:21:00.006-06:00

Okay, for those of you that don't know already....I'm training for a marathon in April. I'm a jogger, not fanatical at all, but this has been a goal of mine for some time - so I'm doing it!

Last night was my long run for the week - 6 miles - and not being a fanatic of running and not loving the treadmill training right now, I start to talk myself out of it during the run because I get tired or because I feel like I need to be doing laundry or something. At 1.5 miles I started thinking of the things I could be doing, at 3 miles I started thinking "this is where I would be if I were only training for the half-marathon, maybe I should do that instead", at 4 miles I thought "I'll just stop at 4.5 miles - that's good enough right?", at 4.5 miles I thought "Geez, I only have a mile and a half to go - finish it up slacker!", and at 6 miles I put my hands up and did a victory dance, then I realized on race day, I would have 20.2 more miles to go. HA! HA!

I am still at a 13 minute mile, that's been the consistent time for me and honestly I don't think that's bad at all! I'm doing sprints and rest periods in between my jogging trying to build up my endurance. And I downloaded a workout through NikeFit from Jean Benoit - it's 30 minutes of music and her talking to you to check your form, etc. and it really forces you to pick up the pace a bit and pay attention to what you're doing. I am supposed to do a 10 mile timed run on Sunday and am hoping that the weather cooperates and that I can do it outside vs. on the treadmill, I don't love running on the treadmill and am anxious to see if I do better outside.

My husband asked me last night "Why again do you want to run a marathon?" - and I simply replied "Because I can", at least I think I can. I do have Lupus and it does affect my joints, in addition to that I have a degenerative disk disease in my lower spine, for a few years all of my doctors and physical therapists told me that I wouldn't run anymore - something I had grown fond of in the summer of 2006. Then in September/October of 2008 I went through physical therapy through a spine clinic and the therapist showed me how to correct any back pains and how to hold myself differently when I walked. He also said "I don't see why you can't run" and with that simple statement I started to feel the itch to hit the road again. The marathon seemed to be motivation for me to actually start up again.

I know it's going to be tough and I continue to try and talk myself out of it.....because I don't LOVE it yet, because of the cold weather, I'm on a treadmill in my house where the kids can come to me to tie their shoes, or to fix a broken game controller, Randy can bring me the phone when someone calls, and I hear the laundry calling me. I know once I hit the road and feel the gravel under each step, breathe in the fresh air, and see the open road in front of me - I am going to love it. I have outside courses mapped out already and the first sign of warmth - I'll lace up my shoes and hit the road.

Happy running!

Angela

Yawn.....I'm tired!

2009-02-03T09:30:00.002-06:00

You know, I just love having lots of fun stuff on the calendar, but it simply doesn't leave much time for sleep!

Friday night was our night to hang out at home and I did get some things done....but that was it!

Saturday started off with a bang - a birthday party for my youngest sons classmate Daisy. Two hours with 15 - 20 five year olds....WHEW! I had to run a few errands after that, eat lunch with the boys and Randy, then Randy and I had to get ready for a fund raiser for our high school Post-Prom. We had that function for 4 hours and then it didn't stop from there.....my husband was having a great time and didn't want to go home, so we headed to a local bar where it seemed like everyone had the same idea we did. It was lots of fun and for my husband, it was a little too much fun....he got a little tipsy! ha! He was funny and borderline obnoxious, so we headed home, where he proceeded to get sick....serves him right for not eating when I told him too! ha!

I was up taking care of my husband until 2:30 a.m., then my oldest son woke up because he had wet the bed - so I was changing sheets and cleaning that up, then when I finally laid down - Randy started to get sick again, UGH!!! I don't know how much sleep I got, but according to the dark circles under my eyes still today....it wasn't much! I'm glad Randy had fun, he rarely over drinks like he did, and I'm glad that I could serve as his designated driver - he got home safely and that is very important! According to him he is never drinking again! ha! ha! (We've all been there honey and I'm not going to hold you to your words! ha!)

Sunday was fun....Randy had lots of guy things to do and I had a fun day planned with my boys. First thing on my list was a hike with our black lab, Lucy. With the winter cold, I feel like she doesn't get enough exercise as she needs, so the warmer weather gave me an opportunity to get her out and get some miles on my running schedule. It was fun and I know she enjoyed it!

Next on our list....ILLINI BASKETBALL! I was able to get two extra tickets to the game and took both the boys and my mom - the win was ugly, but the second half was very exciting and the boys got to see Michael Jordan, which is always fun. One day we will actually meet him - we've seen him about 6 times now - and pretty close up at the United Center game - I just keep holding out for the opportunity to finally introduce ourselves and snap a picture. Overall, super fun and despite the crowded entrance and exit - the boys had a good time and so did my mom!

Final thing on our schedule....SUPERBOWL PARTY! Since all of our guys were hanging together - my girls and I decided to have a party with us and the kids. The game was on, but I don't think we watched any of it - instead we refereed the children and ate TONS! ha! It was great to hang out with them and the kids always have fun together.

We headed home around 7:00 p.m. for a light dinner...apparently my kids didn't eat at the party...only me! ha! ha! So a quick soup and grilled cheese dinner it was! Then showers, a story about Abraham Lincoln, and then bedtime. I should have gone to bed then, but at the party, the girls and I had talked about scary movies and then scary real life stories.....so I couldn't go to sleep until Randy was home......so I finally got to sleep around 11:00 p.m.

WHEW! What a weekend! And Monday was just as crazy -- hectic morning, busy day at work, home for dinner, homework, and I had to get 3 miles in, shower, read the boys a little bit from Tales of Desperaux, Hula dancing from 8:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m., get home and clean the kitchen a little more (my husband tries, but never fully cleans like I like it!), laundry (OH THE LAUNDRY), and finally sleep.

I often wonder before children, what I did with my time? I wouldn't change it for the world, but I would like to have a few more hours to do some much needed things like laundry and sleep! ha!

Hope you are having a wonderful week....don't forget to take time for yourself!

Angela

Running for Ryann Hope

2009-01-30T10:42:00.003-06:00

After two weeks of training for the Illinois Marathon in April the excitement has worn off and it feels like more of a job than a journey. Running is a great stress relief, however, running for hours is really tough to fit into my schedule. I was re-thinking the whole marathon and then I had a request....a simple request "Would you like to wear a t-shirt in honor a Ryann Hope during the race?".

Ryann Hope Smith was the sweet little baby girl that recently passed away due to complications with Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia , or otherwise known as CDH. You can visit Breath of Hope at http://breathofhopeinc.com/ to learn more about CDH or to make a donation. Ryann's parents, Dave and Jaime, and her little sister Reagan continue to journey through their grief, and although I pray for them every day, I know that in addition to prayers, getting the awareness out about CDH is really important to them, so without hesitation I absolutely will wear a t-shirt for Ryann Hope during my race to honor her and to raise awareness.

This morning on my way to work I was thinking about this gesture as well as saying my daily prayers for my dear friends that have lost their children and hoping that they were able to get through their day okay. And all of the sudden I thought to myself the importance of doing this.....and the words "breathing for Ryann" came into my head.

In the short time that Ryann was here on earth she showed such strength and such fight that there is no excuse for me to give up two weeks into my training for a race. The magnitude of 26.2 miles doesn't even equal the marathon that she ran while she was here with us. I am going to train and I am going to run for Ryann Hope and I only hope that her strength and her spirit will help me at mile 15 when I'm sure I going to be tired, or at mile 22 when I think that giving up is an option.

This reason, this purpose, is enough to inspire me to continue to train and run a race that I've talked about running forever. I have set this goal for myself and when I felt like maybe giving up a bit, I now have a purpose to continue, I am going to run my race in honor of Ryann Hope. And if you are at the race and you see the teal colored t-shirts and wrist bands, you'll know that many others were inspired by and are running for the sweet baby girl that made her way into all of our hearts while she was here.

You are what you eat......

2009-01-29T09:24:00.007-06:00

so today that means my kids are sweet potatoes! ha! ha!

I have been using recipes out of Deceptively Delicious cookbook for some time. Find the link here....http://www.amazon.com/Deceptively-Delicious-Simple-Secrets-Eating/dp/006176793X/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1233242732&sr=8-1. And I use the purees in other things as well...I sneak them into spaghetti, macaroni & cheese, etc. Well, my husband threw out the last of my purees and I hadn't had time to make anymore. Until last night!

I steamed and pureed sweet potatoes, cauliflower, and broccoli and they are in my freezer ready for use! Yeah.....more healthy things for my kids! (Again, I'm not going to get nutty about all the healthy stuff.....I promise!)

While I was at it, I mixed up some pancake batter for the next morning and added 1/2 c. sweet potato puree, some cinnamon, and this morning my oldest son ate two HUGE pancakes without even realizing what he was eating and he ate a whole green apple! Our youngest ate yogurt and blueberries....which was healthy and good for his tummy.

Tonight they're going to have pasta and I'll sneak in some broccoli into their sauce.....they never notice and until they get over their fear of vegetables, I feel like this is the only way I can get those important foods eaten. Is it horrible that I'm sneaking healthy things into their food without them knowing?

The one thing I didn't puree last night was spinach and I picked some up this morning when I ran to the store. There is a recipe for brownies that has pureed spinach in it and I'm telling you - my kids never know! I have fed them spinach numerous times and they never whined....because it was hidden in chocolate and sprinkled with a little powdered sugar! ha! ha!

Here is the recipe:

Prep: 15 minutes
Total: 55 minutes
Yield: 12 brownies

Ingredients
Nonstick cooking spray
3 ounces semisweet or bittersweet chocolate
1/2 cup carrot puree (After peeling and trimming the ends, steam for 10-12 minutes and then puree in a food processor for 2 minutes)
1/2 cup spinach puree (Steam for 30 to seconds, then puree in a food processor for 2 minutes)1/2 cup firmly packed light or dark brown sugar
1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
2 tablespoons trans-fat-free soft tub margarine spread
2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
2 large egg whites
3/4 cup oat flour, or all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt

Directions
Preheat the oven to 350°F.

Coat an 8x8-inch baking pan with cooking spray.

Melt the chocolate in a double boiler or over a very low flame. In a large bowl, combine the melted chocolate, vegetable purees, sugar, cocoa powder, margarine, and vanilla, and whisk until smooth and creamy, 1 to 2 minutes.

Whisk in egg whites. Stir in the flour, baking powder, and salt with a wooden spoon.
Pour the batter into the pan and bake 35 to 40 minutes. Cool completely in the pan before cutting into 12 bars.

These brownies are low in calories (only 133 per brownie) and saturated fat. They're also packed with 3 grams of fiber, while spinach and carrots provide two powerful antioxidants that help your kids' eyes stay healthy.

Can you hear me crunching my granola?

2009-01-28T12:40:00.005-06:00

I did it, last night I made my own laundry detergent.....in addition to buying some organic cereals, switching out all of our shampoos, soaps, lotions, and toothpaste with more natural ones, and I bought organic vegetables.

Really, I know.....I'm jumping on a bandwagon here that I'm not quite sure about. I mean, I feel like my family is healthy and that we eat the very best things we can and I look around at other families who are just like us and don't use natural shampoos, eat regular fruits/vegetables - and they are fine.....so why am I doing this.

Well, for awhile now I've been thinking about buying organic fruits/vegetables because I am concerned about pesticides on our foods. And while at the store I saw organic cereals on sale for the same price as regular cereals....so I thought "What the heck!". I also bought bread made with whole grains, no high fructose syrup, etc., and Randy actually liked it. So that's my reasoning for the food.

The laundry detergent, soaps, etc. - well, I have skin issues that are a symptom of my lupus. My skin is actually very sensitive and dry and seems to get worse every year. Lately my scalp has been irritated as well. So in doing some research I decided to make the leap to more natural products, ones that are organic and don't contain chemicals in them that could increase my irritation. And the toothpaste....well, that was just an impulse organic purchase! ha! ha!

In addition to all of this organic madness, last night I made my kids cupcakes using pumpkin puree, flax seed, and yogurt AND I made my own applesauce with a bag of apples that were going to expire before we could eat them all!

Oh my! My husband was just shaking his head at me.....he probably thinks I've lost it!

Reviews:

#1. Homemade laundry detergent.....SUPER easy to make, smells like clean soap, and from the website I got the recipe from - apparently only costs $0.01 per load.

#2. Natural shampoo/conditioner.....my hair has body and shine after one wash and I will have to keep an eye on it to see if it gets healthier while I use these products.

#3. Organic body/face lotion....I already feel a difference in my skin - it feels soft and supple and the last time I used lotion was around 7:15 a.m. - normally it's already dried out.

#4. The cupcakes.....really yummy! It was a box cake mix, 1 can of pumpkin puree, 6 oz. of peach yogurt, 1/4 c. of flax seed, 2 tbl. vegetable oil, 2 large eggs, 1 large egg white, 1/4 c. water and you can either make a cake or cupcakes....so I made cupcakes. It made 24 cupcakes, baked at 350 degrees for about 15 minutes. Logan tested them right out of the oven and gave them a thumbs up!

#5. The applesauce.....always yummy! Noah and I put this in our oatmeal this morning and it was a great treat! Warm apples with cinnamon on a cold snowy day.....aahh!

I promise I won't get completely nutty about all of this natural stuff....I just think it's worth trying. If I see that it helps my family - absolutely it's worth doing - but I won't go overboard, I promise!

Have a happy day!

Angela

Giving my children the healthiest life possible

2009-01-27T11:32:00.004-06:00

You know, as a mother I find myself worrying about everything in my children's environments. There has been a recent scare with peanut butter and I immediately threw out the peanut butter crackers sitting in our snack bin and diligently went through the list of items to make sure there were no remaining suspects in our house. This is the second time in a few years there has been a scare with peanut butter....a staple in our house! I am in the process of switching over to Natural Peanut Butter in my quest to get my children to eat healthier and the brand I use is not on the list....whew!

Recently on a blog I was reading, the mother discussed her quest to get all of the chemicals out of her children's lives....she had them eating organic foods, started making her own laundry detergent, and realized that there are chemicals in shampoos and soaps that aren't healthy. So she began making her own shampoo....I don't know that I would go that far, but I am going to switch to more natural toothpastes, soaps, and shampoos and see if that helps with one of my son's skin issues and Randy's dry scalp. We have always used Ivory soap - and that I feel like is healthy! I have kicked around the idea of making my own laundry detergent - I'll let you know if/when I decide to do it.

I do think I would like to start buying organic fruits and vegetables - I read somewhere that the chemicals on our fruits and vegetables cancel out the benefits of eating them in the first place. That scares me because I really am trying to do my best by getting my kids to eat their veggies, but feel guilty about possibly feeding them more carcinogens than anything!

Now - what would the uses for all of the items that I'm trying to replace. Rather than throw them away....how can I put them to good use?

Toothpaste -

1. Remove crayon marks. Squirt a small dab of non gel toothpaste on the wall where the mark is. Rub gently with a soft cloth, then rinse with warm water -- gone!

2. Deodorize hands - get rid of garlic or onion odor by washing your hands with a blob of toothpaste.

3. Buff a DVD. Get rid of light scratches by squeezing a little non gel toothpaste onto a cotton ball. Wipe over the DVD from the center out to the edge. Rinse with water and dry with a nonabrasive lint-free cloth - all gone.

4. Get rid of pimples. Zap your zit with a blob of non-gel toothpaste. Dab it on before bedtime, leave it overnight. Works wonders.

5. Whiten sneakers. Clean rubber soles by rubbing scuff marks with an old toothbrush and non gel toothpaste.

Shampoo -

1. Mix Shampoo with baking soda to clean chrome and use conditioner to make it shine.

2. Mix with water to clean nylon panty hose and other hand wash delicates

3. Use it to wash hard grime or bird poop off your car or truck.

4. Use it as a spot cleaner. It will remove stains like the ring around the collar of your shirt or the exterior of your down jacket.

5. Use it to wash your paint/arts and crafts brushes.

6. Mix it with water to clean your hardwood floors

7. It works as great spot cleaner for your sofa or couch.

8. Rub a couple drops of shampoo on the inside of your diving mask. Then, rinse clean with
water. Your mask won't fog up when you're diving under the water!

9. Grab the shampoo and a clean rag to spot clean the outside of your refrigerator and stove. It
will remove greasy spots and food spills.

10. Use it remove a stubborn ring off your finger

11. It works well for cleaning the cork handles on old fishing poles.

Conditioner -

1. Work hair conditioner onto hands before changing the oil in your car. Makes cleanup easy and skin nice and soft.

2. Apply hair conditioner to garden tools to prevent rusting

3. Rinse nylons with hair conditioner to zap static cling.

4. Make your own fabric softener -

2 cups of water
1 cup of vinegar
2/3 cups of any hair conditioner

Mix in spray bottle and stir. Don’t shake, this will cause foaming. Soak a cloth rag and ring it out until slightly damp. Then throw it into the dryer with your load of clothes.

This can also be used as a liquid fabric softener in the rinse cycle.

I think that some people might get a tad nutty about going natural (i.e., making your own shampoo with baking soda and water, using cider vinegar as a rinse, and oil for dry hair) - I am going to research actual products that are healthier to use and see how that goes.

Wishing you all a happy and healthy life!

Angela

Saturday Nights All Right For Fighting

2009-01-26T10:50:00.006-06:00

The first part of this is going to be an open letter to the females that caused trouble for my friends and I on Saturday night.

Dear fellow patrons of our small town bar,

I first would like to say that I am sorry that you felt it was your job to secure the bar on Saturday night. I didn't realize that our group of 6 girls were causing trouble by dancing, laughing, talking, and having fun. I wish so much that you would have joined in and done the same so the atmosphere did not take the turn it did.

Secondly, to the female that told me that my shoes were trashy, the next time you critique my outfit I will say the following to you "Oh, I forgot to call you and get your opinion about my outfit.....oh, wait, I just remembered - I don't give a crap what you think".

The third thing I would like to say, the girl who cried when she thought she was going to jail for telling us she was going to kick our butt. Maybe next time you will think about what your saying before opening your mouth, there are consequences to your actions and in this day and age, you can't take threats lightly.

Finally, our lives are stressful enough as wives and mothers. Why would you create unnecessary drama in the lives of others simply because you think you can. We are all about everyone having fun and there is no hatefulness when we are out - we know how difficult it is day to day and we LOVE letting our hair down and having fun and we love seeing others do the same thing. When we go out we like to slip out of our mommy clothes and wear things that remind us that we are girls. My group of friends is the most amazing group of women I know and occasionally we like to go out and dance to good music, laugh, talk, and have a great time. Maybe you have learned from this and will do the same the next time you go out with your friends.

All the best,

THM

The next letter is to the owner of the bar.....we feel horrible that this happened!

Dear sweet owner of the bar,

My group and I were so honored that you placed a special call on Saturday to make sure that we were coming out to support you and your attempt to expand your business a little bit. We had it on our calendars to come out and support you and really looked forward to it.

We are so sorry that a small handful of patrons created the issues that they did and that the situation escalated to the point that it did. We were having so much fun and we hope you know that the behaviors of others will not deter us from patronizing you in the future. You're the best.

All the best,

THM

Finally Friday!

2009-01-23T09:22:00.003-06:00

I love the weekends.....time to relax, get some things done, and spend time with my family and friends!

Tonight I organized a fun family night with our friends and their children. Our local library has a free movie with popcorn and lemonade and then we have invited everyone back to our house for pizza. All of us have goals to save money this year and this is an inexpensive get together that will be lots of fun - I can't wait!

Saturday is a busy day......I have to get 7 miles in for my training and I intend to get that in first thing in the morning. Then we have the Illini game and later that night my girlfriends and I are going to go out in our town to a small neighborhood bar - the owner excitedly announced to us that he is having a DJ for the first time and would love for us to come out. Our town has several bars and there is one that we like to go to because we love the DJ and it's just a good local place, the other one that we like to go to is small and the owner is the sweetest guy and we love to give him business. Usually it's more of a social thing where we take over a table, talk, play our favorite songs on the jukebox, and eat Butch's pizza of course! ha!

Sunday there is nothing on the calendar! WOO HOO! There is an Illini Women's Basketball game at 3:00 p.m. and we might take the boys to that just to get them out of the house. But until then - it will be church, a big breakfast, and lounging......aaaahhhh!

Hope you have lots of fun things planned for the weekend.....be safe, enjoy your family and friends, and we'll see you on Monday!

Adventure in Amish country

2009-01-21T14:24:00.005-06:00

On Saturday my dear husband went hunting for the very last time this season.....YEAH!!!! So when I woke up that morning and had my first cup of coffee....I thought to myself "It's a decent day, why don't you take the boys on an adventure?" - also, I read on another blog about how she feeds her family of 6 on $60 a week by visiting grocery salvages and grocery outlets. I looked on the search website and found that there were two of these in Arthur and Arcola and had actually heard about one of them and I had been wanting to go there and check it out.

The boys woke up and were excited when I detailed the adventure beginning with lunch in Arcola and then all of the neat things we would see. The deal was that they had to help me clean the house before we left and they did - it was great!

Our first stop was at a restaurant in Arcola with delicious homemade food - the boys loved it and ate really well. I had homemade vegetable beef soup.....it was really good and warmed my belly! After that we spotted the first of many horse and buggies.....Logan said at the end of the day that the next time we go he is going to keep count.

Our second stop was the store that I had wanted to go to so I could check out their homemade mixes, seasonings, etc. They had lots of neat things and I bought some hot cocoa, a huge bag of the mini marshmallows that you find in the packets of cocoa for $0.92, a container of powdered cheese mix that is just like the Kraft macaroni and cheese mix and I intend to use it with my whole grain pasta for the kids......not totally healthy, but it's something, I bought taco seasoning, a season salt, some homemade rolls to take to a baptism celebration the next day, a container of blueberries for $0.99, farm fresh eggs, and a few other things that I have already forgotten. I spent around $25 and just had fun looking at the neat things they had there.

Our third stop was at our first actual salvage grocery store. I will not judge those who have to shop there, but I bought the things that I needed on my list - toilet paper, paper towels, and dishwashing detergent and we hit the road. I couldn't bring myself to purchase salad dressing for $0.99 when it had expired 6 months ago. I looked for good deals that were quality items and I just didn't find them there. The things I did buy I thought might be a bit of a deal - but in researching it a bit, I realized that I probably saved a total of $0.63 and that doesn't include the gas it took to drive there.

Our fourth stop was at the soda fountain in downtown Arthur - the boys were excited to have ice cream in the winter and it was a cute little place and we enjoyed just sitting and chatting about the things they had seen. We then ventured down the street to the little shops and I ended up buying them stuffed animals that were not discount......OOPS! - but it was fun and they were happy!

Our fifth and final stop of the day was by accident. I was leaving Arthur and spotted a sign for another grocery salvage and despite my experience at the first one - I thought to myself "While I'm here......" - so I quickly turned and traveled down the road to a farm where the grocery salvage was. This one was similar to the other, but much cleaner, and I still didn't see any huge deals. But overall - it was fun because the children saw the farm up close.

Our day was good and I definitely think our first stop was a place that I will visit again for their unique items - not necessarily because they had awesome deals. The grocery salvages were not for me - I am trying to save money this year - however, I have found that by searching the ads, using coupons, buying fruits and vegetables that are in season, and making things from scratch save more than I could save at these places.

It was quite an adventure and I had fun with the boys and I learned a lot! I excitedly made them macaroni and cheese with the new cheese mix and whole grain pasta - and they loved it! They have had hot cocoa with mini marshmallows every morning since Saturday. And the homemade rolls were a hit at the baptism celebration.

The boys of course thought the salvage store was AWESOME because they had a huge toy area and I did agree to buy them coloring books for $0.25 - and they loved the horse and buggies. Noah tried to strike up a conversation with a small Amish boy, but the boy didn't respond so Noah gave up saying "Mom, I don't think he speaks English".

Look around your area and see if there are adventures you can take your children on that are off the beaten path......they learn about other cultures, get to experience things first hand, and it is a break from the norm.

Randoms

2009-01-20T13:42:00.004-06:00

#1 Wow, very historical day - even if you didn't vote for Barack Obama, the historical impact of this should have moved you just a little. I had tears, felt chills, and really felt proud to be an American when they discussed the shift of powers being peaceful - we are so fortunate that we have a voice in our leadership and that no blood was shed as the former president sat and watched the new president take on the role of leader and laid out a plan for our future.

#2 I am right on target for my marathon training.....I ran 6 miles on Saturday and didn't die - so that's a plus! ha! I am consistently at a 13 minute mile, which isn't that bad I don't think. For not being an avid runner - I think I'm doing well. I ran 3 miles yesterday morning without any issues and am only allowing myself to take it one mile at a time.....I don't want to think about the magnitude of 26.2 miles or else I might run the other way! ha! Tonight is a challenge - there is an Illini game at 6:00 p.m. and I won't get home until 8:30 p.m. or so and need to get 5 miles in.....not a problem - my treadmill and shoes are waiting for me and I will get my run and a shower in and be in bed by 9:45 p.m.

#3 Motherhood is tough and my oldest son challenges me so often......often times he and I are both brought to tears before he gives in and sees that I am doing things for his own good and not because I'm an evil mother. I continue to pray for patience in both he and I and while I do have my breaking points - I know that while his actions are challenging - they aren't anything that I can't handle and I have to remember the mothers around me that pray even for one more day with their child - even the worst day - they just want one more chance to see, hold, touch, talk to, etc. I am blessed.

#4 We adopted a new soldier! I have been volunteering with the organization Adopt-A-Platoon for a little over a year now and you have the option of sending a letter a week to a soldier or you can also send a monthly package. We had a soldier for about 8 months and then he was able to go home - which made us very happy, but we missed staying in contact with him and sending packages to him. Yesterday they sent us our new soldier and included a few items that he would like - which are very modest - toothbrush, razor, toothpaste, nail clippers, etc. - so I filled his list and then some.......I will be excited to buy some movies and video games tomorrow and then send it out to him and I pray that he is as excited about opening it as I have been about buying each item. If you have time, this is a great family activity - my boys colored him pictures yesterday and we have been talking about him and the things he wanted on his list.

I hope you have a great day!

Angela

5 miles in and lots more to go!

2009-01-16T10:03:00.003-06:00

I promise that all of my blogs won't be about running, but I am committing myself to this and so I will occasionally bring it up!

So far many women have said to me about running the marathon "Go for it", "You can do it", and "I'll be on the sidelines cheering you on"......my response from men "NO WAY!", "You can't train for that in 4 months", "You are going to die". And my response to that is "Girls, I love you and thank you for your support. Guys, eat my dust." - as well as "It's on like Donkey Kong", "Girls rule and Boys drool" and "Go big or go home"......you know, very mature, lady-like responses.

I am challenged now - I am determined - I am focused - I am a little crazy, but don't you have to be to be excited about running 26.2 miles?!

Yesterday I logged 5 miles - I set my iPod up with some kick-butt music - a mix of angry rock (Breathe by Prodigy.....a very important reminder for running), classic rock (Thunderstruck by ACDC.....makes me want to run out onto the football field and tackle someone), pop (Womanizer by Britney Spears......need I say more?), and rap (Drop by the Ying Yang Twins.....not only does this song make me want to dance, it's also effective for sprinting as well). I hopped on my treadmill after doing lots of mommy things - dinner, baths, bedtime......and the stress of the day melted away and I just ran. I also had the Discovery Channel on and watched something about scientists trying to find a sunken ship in the English Chanel.....very eye catching and interesting to watch while running.

Also, because I've been eating right and exercising since the beginning of the year....I have also dropped the 9 lbs. I gained from the holidays. Not bad in my opinion.....I have 10 lbs. to go to get to my first goal and then we'll see what I feel like at that point.

I hope that you have a great weekend and that you take some time for yourself.

Love ya - Angela

And I was running.......

2009-01-15T11:06:00.005-06:00

Okay, I like to run and it's not always something I get to do because of busy schedules, etc., but there is a marathon coming up in April right here in my hometown and I think I'm going to go for it. The other night when I was upset with my husband and kids and saying a little prayer I asked the Lord to help me find ways to relieve the stresses of my life so that I don't feel like I'm yelling all the time. Stress isn't good for you and the last time I was active in running, I would head out for a long run with the weight of the world on my shoulders and I would return revived and ready to tackle the world.

So this morning I was on my way to work and there was an ad for the local races coming up in April.....and a little voice inside my head said "Just Do It"! Of course I e-mailed my sister and she had been thinking about it too.....and both of us said we would want to do the whole thing. If you are going to do it, you might as well go all out right?

So I am going to get signed up, lace up my running shoes, set up my iPod with some kick a$$ music and get into gear. Of course I chose a day to start doing this when it's minus 35 degrees outside with the wind chill factored in! ha! I have 12-weeks to get myself in shape and I am up for the challenge. I have a goal and that is to complete my first marathon and it's so fitting that the finish line is at the 50-yard line of the place I work. I love it....and I'm also planning my orange and blue outfit for the race.....I have to look cute right?

Your goal might be something completely different than mine, but there is no better day than today to set your sights on it and start. We are officially two weeks into the new year and if you haven't started on your goals, resolutions, or whatever you call them.....now is the time. You have to visualize yourself reaching your goal and walk yourself (or in my case, run yourself - ha!) through the steps that it will take to get there.

Today is the day and know that I'll be on the sidelines cheering you on as you cross the finish line of your goal!

My fun family night.....not so fun!

2009-01-14T10:01:00.002-06:00

As a mom, I have learned not to have expectations because there is a high risk for disappointment. Instead of enjoying a fun family night last night - I locked myself in my room because both Randy and Logan were acting like jerks and they really hurt my feelings.

I keep reminding myself "I am building cathedrals, I am building cathedrals......"

Motherhood is not an easy job - but I wouldn't change a thing.

Planning, cutting coupons, and a little smarts pays off!

2009-01-13T09:42:00.004-06:00

My #1 goal this year is to save money and to be frugal with my purchases. I went through the ads on Sunday, clipped coupons, and looked at the coupons I had and realized - I would be able to get some great bargains this week!

Major bargain.....$32.00 worth of Chex Mix Bars for $3.96 - my husband and I eat bars every day and I send them with my kids in their lunches and we use them with yogurt as healthy snacks - so an item that we would definitely use!

How I did it.....I belong to Vocalpoint - a website where I am able to receive free samples of products as well as coupons. I received a free box of the Chex Mix bars and then 10 coupons for $1.50 off per box. They are a little pricey for me - in the $3.50 per box range and even with the $1.50 off, it never seemed like a better deal than any other bar.

At Walgreens the bars were on sale for $2.00 a box....so I was able to get 8 boxes with my coupons at $0.50 each and one box free using a $2.00 off Walgreens coupon. We are set for some time!

Good bargain......Venus Embrace razors. Aaahhh.....we all know the feeling of having a great razor that gives you smooth skin! I typically use the Bic pink lady razor that is just okay....it's cheap and it does an okay job. Through Vocalpoint I received a free sample of the Venus Embrace razor and 5 coupons for $4 off. The razor was wonderful and I was sad when I realized it was no longer useful and had to throw it away....I thought about buying replacement blades for it, however at $25 a pop - thought NO WAY!

Venus Embrace razors run about $9 - $10 a piece and even with my coupons, I still couldn't see paying that much for them, knowing that the replacement blades were so much.

Yesterday I found them on sale at Wal-Mart for $7.96 - and they each had two replacement blades with them.....so I bought 15 GOOD razors essentially for under $20.00 by using my coupons. I will cherish them and make them last as loooong as possible! Next time you see me, just ask to feel my legs, they will be sure to please! ha! ha!

By using coupons, checking the ads, comparing prices, etc. - yesterday I bought the following items all for under $200.00 -

2 lb. bag baby carrots
1 stalk celery
2 bags of salad
1 English cucumber
1 Avocado
1 bunch of bananas
1 gallon milk
1 lb. bag Shredded cheddar cheese
3 lb. bag Tyson boneless skinless chicken breast
9 boxes Chex Mix bars
5 Venus Embrace razors
6 containers Grands Biscuits
2 containers Pillsbury Crescent Rolls
10 Yoplait Yogurts
2 containers of Yoplait Yogurt for kids
3 Green Giant Frozen vegetables
4 Meijer Pasta Sauce
1 loaf Healthy Life bread
4 Healthy Life containers of lunchmeat
Container of 18 eggs
Oscar Meyer Turkey Hot Dogs
Container of Blueberries
Container of Blackberries
2 packages of Turkey Sausage Breakfast Links
Suave shampoo for children
Dog bone
Box of 80 trash bags
Fantastic Cleaner
Scrubbing Bubble Foam Cleaner
Scrubbing Bubble Wipes
Windex Antibacterial Cleaner
4 Campbell's Cream of - soups
2 containers Grape Tomatoes
5 lbs. split Chicken Breasts
5 containers Quick Cooking Oatmeal
1 box saltine crackers
5 bottles of ketchup
2 boxes of children's valentines
1 child's coat
2 pair of children's pajamas
Lunch for two at McDonald's
Two slushes at Sonic

I still have $2.00 left and I plan on treating myself to a latte tomorrow at a local coffee shop that has $2 Lattes any size on Wednesday! woo hoo!

In addition to that I earned $8.00 in bonus Box Tops from Meijer and Walgreen's for my purchase of certain items. Another woo hoo!

I love getting bargains and I am kind of a stickler about having our pantry stocked full of stuff - I think it's a trait I get from my grandma who could feed an army at any given moment. I think we are good for some time.....although I say that after every shopping trip! ha! ha!

Happy bargain hunting!

Angela

I am an invisible woman and I'm okay with it

2009-01-09T12:11:00.007-06:00

I read this today on another blog and it's so powerful that I need to share it with you. This is my new mantra - something that I needed for the new year. For those of you that are a little lost and wondering why you are where you are in your life - I hope this helps you today.

"It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I’m on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I’m thinking, “Can’t you see I’m on the phone?” Obviously not. No one can see if I’m on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all.

I’m invisible.

Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this? Some days I’m not a pair of hands; I’m not even a human being. I’m a clock to ask, “What time is it?” I’m a satellite guide to answer, “What number is the Disney Channel?” I’m a car to order, “At 5:30, please.”

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She’s going … she’s going … she’s gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, “I brought you this.” It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe.

I wasn’t exactly sure why she’d given it to me until I read her inscription: “To Charlotte, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.”

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths:1. No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names.2. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished.3. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.4. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.

A story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, “Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it.” And the workman replied, “Because God sees.” I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, “I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you’ve done, no cupcake you’ve baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can’t see right now what it will become.”

At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. When I really think about it, I don’t want my son to tell the friend he’s bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, “My mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours.” That would mean I’d built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, “You’re gonna love it there.”

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we’re doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women."

Watching from the outside looking in....

2009-01-07T16:05:00.002-06:00

I am going to a funeral on Friday to support my friends through their grief upon losing their 9 day old daughter. Unfortunately this is not the first funeral of a child that I have or will attend and it's simply not something that I will ever understand. Why children? That is a question that my friend Amy, upon losing her 3 1/2 year old son, said will never be answered. No answer to that question would make her say "Oh yeah, that makes sense" - so as a parent you would live forever with the unanswered question.

And talking about looking at the situation as a parent - I realized that I really cannot imagine how I would react, feel, continue living. I really can't relate to what my friends who have lost children have felt and continue to feel day to day. Watching the situation from the outside looking in is painful because you feel for the ones you love, but I think that unless you have experienced that great of a loss - you really don't know what that person is feeling.

Grief is something that each person does differently and I learned so much from my friends Joe and Amy as they grieved and continue to grieve the loss of their son - Amy told me that each person grieves different moments, different times of day, different everything. And because of that she and her husband had to allow one another those times when you simply lose it and just know that they were consumed by grief at that moment.

When I first talk to people who have experienced loss - I am so reserved and scared that I will say something upsetting.....I let them talk first, laugh first, cry first. I know walking up to Jaime and Dave on Friday I will give them hugs and tell them that I am sorry for the loss of their beautiful little girl and from there I will just observe and allow them to grieve and pray that their journey through that grief is one that they can find strength in one another and that they will turn the negative situation into a positive one and that they bring light to CDH and honor Ryann Hope's spirit and strength in doing so.

There are no words

2009-01-06T14:07:00.002-06:00

Good friends of mine had a baby girl pass away yesterday after an 8 day fight with CDH - a birth defect where her lungs did not develop properly. Please keep Dave, Jaime, and Reggan in your prayers and know that our new little angel Ryann Hope made this world a better place although she was only in it for a short time.

May you hug your babies a little tighter tonight and feel blessed to have today, because tomorrow might not always be there.

Angela